Tremendously Thankful Thoughtful Thursday!Today I am thankful that Mike is alive. If I am to be honest, he is in a struggle over his will verses God's and I can only pray for him and love him through the struggle. Trust me when I say this is not always easy. Just yesterday morning I was carrying on to God. I came to Him with something like this:
Father, I come before you at my wits end where Mike is concerned again. I am trying to follow the teachings of Jesus, Father, but I am angered by his indifference. I love him with all my heart, but currently he is being detrimental to my heart. I come before you in desperation for relief. Give me more wisdom and strength. Help snuff my anger and hold my tongue when I feel as if Mike has purposely gone out of his way to hurt my feelings. Teach me to rest in you through all storms. Please reach out to him Father and soften his heart. Open His Eyes. Awaken him. I know you Love him. Help him to see the truth. Help me find peace in the chaos. Help me trust that you have this. In Jesus name I pray. Amen
So, Last night after work, I headed off the the YMCA with Travis, my 11 year old. Mike was supposed to meet up with us there after he finished his work. By the time I was done working out I had still not seen Mike. I went to go find Travis and when I went to the teen room I could see our car. I looked to see if Mike's motorcycle was out there and it was not. Eerily enough I heard a very calming voice say, "Mike wrecked his bike". My first reaction was "No way." my next thought was, "He doesn't have a phone." and then I was like heck even if he did have one my battery is dead. I chastised myself for allowing my phone to be down. It happens more than I care to admit. I'm not someone who checks my phone all day long. I often forget it in a rush out the door. I grew up before cell phones were around and I work all day answering the phone. It hurts my head to talk on my cell phone without a headset so I find it most inconvenient to be quite honest. Regardless of all that, I pushed away the thought that Mike had wrecked.
I found Travis down by the entrance and asked if he was ready to go. He informed me he was starving and ready. We walked out the door, got in the car and had just pulled out of the YMCA when we saw Mike coming around the corner on his bike. I chided myself for being so foolish as to have the thought he had wrecked his bike. He was just being Mike. It was a nice day. He'd most likely taken a ride in the country. I came to a stop and Mike pulled up. "I wrecked. I flipped off my bike. I didn't have a phone. I'm hurt." He lifted his right arm and it was ugly to say the least. He informed me he had stopped by the house and a neighbor had cleaned him up a bit. He said, "I tried to call you but it went straight to voice mail. All I could think was I needed to get to you." I was surprised to see him wearing his helmet. The last 3 days he has chosen not to wear it so he could feel the wind in his hair! Just last week he rode it in sandals as well as without his helmet. I stared at him for a moment in disbelief. I knew it was God that had protected him.
As I doctored Mike's arm, we began talking. I looked at him and said, "I'm so glad you had your helmet on today. You would have most likely been killed without it. It would not have been pretty to say the least."
He said, "I know. I fought with myself over wearing it 3 times." He told me he really didn't want to wear it. He confided that he went to his bike 3 times without it but kept feeling like he should have it on so he gave in to the pull on his heart and put it on. It was God's WILL that Mike wear his helmet yesterday. It was Mike's will that he not. I'm so thankful God speaks His desire more than once.
Today I pray we all begin to listen to that soft strong voice when we hear it. Even more so when we resist it. Sometimes, Father, I think the buzz of the outside world is so loud I don't take the time to recognize your voice. I push it off as my imagination or I find it in conflict with what I want so I deny it. Help me sit still. I have heard before everything, pray. I must admit, I am not to this point in my life but it is where I want to be. Help me grow Father. I am beginning to recognize when I am off kilter. It is directly tied to how much I have or have not focused on you. Whether I have turned to you with my troubles or held onto them myself. Sometimes in my anger, I become so foolish. Fill me with your Love Lord. Fill me with Your Wisdom. I am determined to put you first every day! Help me turn to you immediately in crises, fear and doubt. I pray for more Grace and Wisdom and Strength. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.
Mom of Many
© Wendy Glidden 2013