My grandma gave me a book for my birthday somewhere around
age 27 give or take a year or two. On the inside of the book, she had written a
message to me. “May you learn to live before you die, Love, Grandma Rosie.”
I cannot remember for the life of me what the book was, but
I never forgot her words.
This morning I awoke and wondered what God had in store for
me. Since my computer is down, I found my so called smart phone and opened my
email account and searched for K-loves encouraging word of the day. When I
opened it up, I read this;
Your laws are always right; help me to understand them so I
may live. ~ Psalm 119:144, NLT
When I read that, so many things flashed into me all at
once. This is how I am led to write what I write. These flashes of insight are
why even when I begin to doubt that this is my path, I remember the
conversations God and I had about me writing one day and I know to my very core,
this is what I am meant to do. I am a ghost writer for the greatest writer of
all. He communicates things and ideas to me via the flashes and talking
thoughts. It is my honor to share all he shares with me. I am blessed in doing
so. I am humbled to be given such a task.
My wit, my patience, my kindness, my heart, everything that
is good about me is due to Him in me. I absolutely love who I am in Him. When I
walk on my own, things don’t often turn out quite so well. This is most obvious
when you read my life story.
So back to the inscription my grandmother had written me.
When I read it I was like; what? Live before I die? I’m living now. What does
she mean?
I did not ask her outright that day. Instead, I pondered it
over the years though. As I look back over my life and many of the things my
grandmother has said to me I am sure that she was moved by the spirit to say
them. I believe this to be the case because they have been one liners and they
have been deep. Short, sweet and full of meaning. Often the spirit talks to me
directly in such a fashion.
When I read that encouraging word, one of the things that
flashed to me is that sin is death. When we chose to live outside of Gods laws,
we often find ourselves deep in some kind of trouble that was brought on by our
own doing. This kind of living is not living at all, it is simply surviving.
Sure we are alive. We are breathing, moving, working or whatever but in all
honesty we are not living at all.
We allow our actions to hold us in bondage. You see, it does
not always feel good to walk outside of Gods laws. If you got real truthful
with yourself, much of what you are doing when you are living outside of the
law, does not make you proud. Meaning it is something you don’t want the entire
world to know about. This is something the evil one relishes. As soon as you
yourself are not proud of what you are doing, as soon as you begin to avoid
certain people or places for fear others may see you ‘in the moment’, the devil
has all he needs to begin shaming you into silence.
So, when King David says help me understand your laws so I
may live, this is what he was talking about.
When you are on top of the world, doing what is right in all
ways, you can stand proudly and you do. It is like the sun is beaming on you
and life is good. It is abundantly good. Most of us have had one of those
moments in our lifetime when everything was perfect and worry was not even a
passing thought. We had nothing to worry about. We were on the right path.
On this earth it is so very easy to slide off of the right
path, the narrow path, because so many temptations are lurking around every
corner. Shame is a guilt that will chain you quickly. It truly is enough to
keep one from their purpose in life.
If you are afraid of others discovering something from your
past or present, you will not be near as bold about things. This is why it is
best to come clean of everything. Leave the devil with nothing to shame you
with. If you step forward and say; I did that and I did this and it did not
feel good but it is part of my history, it is what it is. By doing this, those
things lose their power over you. You will break the chains of slavery.
When you sin, you may not fully grasp in that moment that
you have supplied the evil one with the tools he needs to enslave you into
bondage. He will haunt you later in life with your shames. Don’t allow him that
privilege. Don’t hand over that power. There is NO REASON to! Your heavenly
father loves you so much; he provided you a way to freedom. He provided you
with the law of liberty. Step out of the shadows and allow yourself to bask in
the sun. Come follow the son of God and live an abundant life.
The birthday wish my grandma gave me approximately 17 years ago
is the same prayer I say for all my brethren today. “May you learn to live
before you die.”
My computer is in the hands of a friend. I do not yet know
if it can be saved but I do now have in my email both of the chapters from book
III that I feared may be lost. I still have 4 chapters to polish off to finish
my book and I am certainly behind schedule at this point but I am not going to
stress over any of it. This is Gods book. He put it on my heart to share with
the world. It will hit the shelves right when it is supposed to.
Should I need a new computer, then a new one I will find
this weekend! I hear there is a mighty storm headed our way. I wondered when I
heard it was on its way for sure if it was perhaps going to be enough to allow
me to stay home toasty warm and finish this third volume God put on my heart to
write. We will see won’t we?
Father, today I come before you with such gratitude. As I
read all of King David’s 119th Psalm I found myself crying. I am so
thankful that he too was willing to share all you put on his heart to share.
His words and songs to you have lifted me so many times lately. I find him and
his love for you very inspiring. To know that I am not alone in any way. To
know that you love us regardless of anything we may do. It is such a gift to
understand the depth of your love. I thank you for never giving up on me and
for sending others my way to minister to me over the years. May I be a hand or
foot for you as well. May my words lift and encourage and shine light into the
darkest corners of the world. I have so much to be thankful for my Lord. Please
fill my heart with your love so that I may reveal your glory to all I manage to
touch in my lifetime. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.
Wendy, walks with God,
Mom of Many
© Wendy Glidden