What Do You Really Know About the Thief?

Today when I opened up the encouraging word sent to me from K-Love, this is what I found:

The thief's purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.
~ John 10:10, NLT

The thief goes by many names. No matter what you decide to call him, the fact remains,he exists and he indeed is here to steal, kill, and destroy. With thousands of years of experience under his belt, he makes quite a formidable foe!

One of his best tricks through out time has been to make people forget about him! I imagine this is due to the fact that a thief does not want to be seen! Things work out better for them that way!

Satan, the father of lies, the thief, the serpent, the devil, it truly matters not what you call him, is always on the prowl. He is sneaky. He is shrewd. He is all but silent and he is most assuredly deadly. He is on a mission to put out the light inside all of us. You simply cannot allow this to happen to you.

How do you recognize when you are under a spiritual attack? That is a great question. The closer you get to God, the better the relationship you have with him, the easier you will begin to see the truth. You will quickly recognize an attack for exactly what it is and you will be able to rest in the Lord. I know this is true because I have tangled with Satan just as you have. You may not even realize that is what was going on at the time. I know I didn't for decades. It's only been in my persistent seeking that I discovered amazing truths about my own journey in life thanks to what God showed me as He had me unfold my life onto paper. Through my books, I pull back the curtain and reveal Satan working his magic in my life throughout my personal story.

We live in a fallen world. Bad stuff is bound to happen to all of us. We must keep our focus on the truth and not on how we feel. Satan loves feelings. He can use them against you. Just look all the way back in history to Cain. He became jealous of his brother. Satan used that 'feeling' and took advantage of the situation. I can only imagine what he whispered into Cain's ear. I truly don't believe Cain intended to kill his brother. It is my belief that he acted out on his emotions and dealt a fatal blow. Once done, it could not be taken back. Next I imagine Satan comforted Cain with lies. After all, he is the father of lies. I believe this is what happened mainly because of the way Cain answered God when God asked him where his brother Abel was. All too often I have witnessed this same bravado defensive stance from my own children and embarrassingly enough, through my own story!

My heart goes out to Cain. He was used by Satan big time. I believe all of us are used by him. He's just that good at what he does. This is why we must recognize him for who he is. A very shrewd opponent.

This year I have published two books. They are my first two volumes of my personal story and it takes you from the beginning of my story all the way through my twenty third year. You wouldn't think much could happen to a girl in her first two decades of her life, but that is where you would be wrong!

All who have elected to take a look at this true life series have also taken the time to send me a note so this has been a most rewarding experience. As you will learn by reading my story, I am now doing what God and I talked about me doing as a child.

For those who would like to check it out for themselves, I am offering a FREE view at the first three chapters in both volume I & II! If you love them, buy the books and if you don't find my story captivating and encouraging, you are out not one dime!

I priced each e-book at only $3.99 and print for only $7.99 because I don't want cost to become an issue ever! God called me forth to share my story and He has led me along the way. The first weekend I released my second volume I offered a FREE download of each volume. In 72 hours, I gave away 200 books on Amazon!

I am blessed to have been given all the desires of my heart. You'll clearly see what those are when you read the book! Without further delay, here is the link to get your free download or to buy the books in either Kindle or Print! Happy Reading.

http://www.Amazon.com/author/wendyglidden

I am happy to announce that volume III will be on the shelves before the end of March 2014! It is going to be called: Angels, Answers, Signs and Wonders! Followed shortly behind by Volume IV: In the Midst of Spiritual Warfare. I pray you find my story strengthens your faith.

** Update: Volume III is available in both print and electronic formats. It is my goal to still have Volume IV out before the end of 2014. I have certainly learned a lot about the subject in the last couple of years ~ it's the amazing triumphs I am looking forward to sharing! Don't forget to like me on facebook for an encouraging word! http://www.facebook.com/youareworthytoo

 Be blessed and be a blessing <3

Wendy, walks with God,
Mom of Many

© Wendy Glidden, 2014

A Prayer of Protection for the Children of God

It's Tremendously Thankful Thoughtful Thursday! I love this day. Honestly, ever since I renamed all the days of the week a year ago, I have fallen in love with every one of them. I am working on a calendar to go along with the renaming. There is so much work I have set myself up for this year! I am truly super excited to see it all come together.

As many of you know, I start my days out with K-loves encouraging word. Today is one of those days where you see or hear something and you just know it was created especially for you. Many of this years encouraging words have made me feel that way. Today's encouraging word comes from Matthew, Chapter 6, verses 26 - 27:

verse 26: Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they?

verse 27: And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life?

For me when I read this verse it was as if God was personally reaching out to me and reminding me that He always will take care of me. I will never go without. Therefor don't worry about things like, "If I am pregnant with another child, how on earth will I manage everything?"

As of today, I am behind schedule and very well may be pregnant. The old me, the girl who attempted to do everything in her own strength would be freaking out to the max right now. Instead, I see this for what it is. Either a blessing or a gentle reminder to remain firm in my faith. I have no idea what God has in store for me, but I have Faith it is all good.

The other day. Sunday as a matter of fact. We were all getting ready for church. As often happens in a home with more than one child, various arguments were beginning to brew. I have been trying to get my children to realize how silly their disputes are to no avail.

However, something happened this past Sunday and I can only believe it was the Holy Spirit speaking through me to my children. I don't remember exactly what happened prior but what ever it was, it made me call an emergency family meeting with the children.

Once I had every one's attention, I began talking. "Do any of you know how sneaky the father of lies is?" No one answered so I wondered if they knew who I was referring to. I talk about him often but you never really know what your children pick up on and what they don't, so I continued, "The father of lies is Satan. He is so sneaky he can say things to you and make you think they are your own thoughts. The thoughts he plants inside of your head can make you angry or jealous and before you know it you are in a fight with one of your sisters or brothers." Now I had their full attention.

I have often wondered why when you have more than one child riding in a car one for any length of time one of them is always bound to begin crying out, "Stop looking at me!" I know I did this myself as a child. Today I truly believe this is one of many arrows the evil one launches at innocent minds; The feeling that a sibling is somehow making fun of them by simply looking at them even when they aren't even being looked at! So, I used that scenario to paint the scene of silliness for them. Using humor when teaching is often effective!

After that I asked them if any of them knew how they could protect themselves from Satan. Wide eyed and captivated they all looked at each other to see if anyone had a hand up. No one did. I told them I was going to teach them a prayer that would protect them and that they would need to say it every morning and every night and anytime they felt they might be under an attack. This is the prayer I taught them:

"Good morning God. I know that I am in a spiritual war. I am just a kid. I do not know how to protect myself. Please protect me in all your mighty ways. In Jesus name I pray. Amen."

Simple, sweet and right to the point. We said it together line by line. Then I asked, "Who knows the first line?" and continued until we had said the entire prayer. As they took turns saying a part of the prayer they either changed it a little or added words to it. I smiled and said, yes. That's it. You don't have to say it exactly the same every time, you just need to say the prayer how it comes out. You are praying for protection because you know that you are in a spiritual war. You are asking God to help you win the battle.

Next I asked them if any of them knew why we pray in the name of Jesus? None of them did so we talked about the sacrifice Jesus made for us. We talked about how He could have called out at anytime to stop it all yet He did not. We talked about how His blood had to be poured out for our sins to be covered and it was in His dying that He concurred death for us. We talked about how important it was to get to know about Jesus. We talked about how after He left, the Holy Spirit came and how we walk in the Spirit today. It seemed to make quite the impression on them. God never ceases to amaze me. I was surprised to hear myself speaking the words I was speaking but I continued to let them be spoken for I knew the source.

I have to tell you, the fights in my house have diminished tremendously since they all began saying this prayer. In all honesty, there has not been a fight between any of them that I can recall this entire week. Traveling in the car has even been peaceful. That my friends is amazing.

Satan uses whatever he can to disrupt your day in an attempt to put your light out. Don't think for one second he is not out to steal your joy, kill your dreams and destroy your family. Children are a great weapon for him to use against adults and use them he does.

God gave me that prayer to share with my children. This morning as I was spending time with the Lord, this prayer came full blown to me again along with the above title of this post and I knew what I would be writing about today.

I love that God gives me titles to write on. They seem to unlock writers block for me. This month I have been doing so much reading and researching and learning that I have not written a lot myself. Yesterday as I went to bed I was thinking to myself, 'It is already Wednesday night and I have written nothing new this week.'

I know it is silly but sometimes I fear no more words will come to me. That is a fiery arrow from the evil one! I know that because of the vision that God gave me last year.

I was in a meeting with my life coach, Cathy Padgett, and she was praying over me. I had my eyes closed and all of a sudden a whirlwind of post it notes were whipping all around me. Quickly they began sticking to the walls in perfect order. One right after the other, side by side, all blank. I told Cathy about the vision and how I was not sure what it meant. I was focused on the post it notes. I am not a fan of them. I thought it was odd that they started out in a tornado like fashion and then quickly got in order against the wall but I admitted I had no real idea what the vision meant.

It was on my way home that I got the second piece of the vision. I was in the process of asking God what the post it notes meant when I clearly heard, "You will fill them all."

Suddenly I knew! He was showing me that I would indeed have the desires of my heart. The whole thing was so abundantly overwhelming I cannot even put into words how big my heart expanded.

I hope in me sharing this amazing testimony you also are better equipped to recognize Satan's fiery arrows. I know he wants to keep me from writing. This is why he fires the thought at me. He wants to grip my heart with fear so that all I can think about is his fiery arrow: 'What if the words stop'. God gave me the vision so I could quickly distinguish that negative soundtrack from playing. The words will never stop. They belong to God and they are never ending.

I also know that Satan does not want me praying. He doesn't want any of us standing firmly in our faith. He will try with all his might to shake it. He never rests, he never stops fighting, he is relentless, shrewd and wise in the ways of war and how to best wage it against you. Don't for one second think you have defeated him! You must put on your full suit of armor every day. Pray for others always and when you think of someone out of nowhere, say a quick prayer for them. There are no coincidences. You thought of them for a reason.

I am learning more and more about God, His Word and how to protect myself from the evil one. However, I also know just how shrewd the evil one is and how quickly he can attack you out of nowhere. So, it is my suggestion that everyone say a daily prayer for protection. You can make it simple, you can use the one above and change it to fit who you think you are. For example, you could say: Good morning God. I know I am in a spiritual war. I am just learning about spiritual battles and the armor I need to protect myself. So I am here to ask you to please protect me in all your mighty ways. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

Or you can say something like, "Good morning God. I thank you for all you do for me in the ways of protection. I thank you for always having my back. I am not the wisest when it comes to the ways of war and I have moments of weakness. I know that is all the evil one needs to come at me full force. When I put my guard down Lord I pray you shake me awake so that I quickly see my foe at work and understand all I need is to trust and rest in You. You are faithful Lord. I know that. I trust that. Help me be a mighty warrior so I can help more captives break free. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

Prayer is incredible. It is a form of protection and one you should use daily! I used to fear saying prayers out loud. I was afraid I didn't know how to pray the right way! The funny thing is I have been saying prayers most of my life, I just never thought of them as prayers. I thought of them as talks with God. It is impossible to say a bad prayer. Satan wants to keep you from praying for he knows their is actual power in prayers. Don't allow him to keep you from praying. We all need to pray every day. We need to come to God with joy in our hearts knowing how incredible He is and thanking Him for everything. Next we ask for help with something. After I ask for the help I need, I thank Him again. He is the almighty God and nothing is too hard for Him.

I know when it comes to praying all of us have gone to God and asked for something and have felt like we didn't get it. The best example I can think of is those that ask for a loved one to be healed and instead of being made better, they pass away. This is a big reason many in the world have lost faith in God. I would like to remind all of you that our days on earth are numbered. We don't get to chose where we are born and we don't get to pick how we exit this life. We are born, we live and we all die a physical death. We should not fret over this. We can and should always pray for healing but we should not lose heart when a loved one does not recover. It is my belief that it was their time to die. The way they exit may indeed cause much heartache and despair so pray for the lives around that person as well.

It's been a few posts since I have added a song to a blog post. I am sure I am meant to share this song with you here on this post for it just began playing in my head. That is no coincidence for my son is sitting next to me watching a kid show on Netflix and there is a song playing that is nothing like this. Try thinking of a song on purpose while another song is playing. It's hard. With that being said, I leave you with Sanctus Real and their hit song, Pray: 

Father, I thank you today for all you have done for me. I am blown away by the visions I see now and all I can say is thank you thank you thank you. I am humbled to think you love me so much. After all who am I? Yes. I am a child of yours. Plain and simple. You love your children. How that knowledge explodes my heart. Help me be a bright light Lord. Help me be a mighty warrior. I want nothing more than to help my fellow brothers and sisters break out of captivity. Please use me Lord. In every way you see fit. I am so pleased to finally be doing what I have always wanted to do. Write words of encouragement. Thank you for using me in such great ways. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

Wendy Glidden, walks with God

Mom of Many

© Wendy Glidden 2014

Do You See What I See?

Today is fantastically fabulous fun filled friends and family Friday!! The first one of 2014 as a matter of fact! With Christmas and New Years falling mid week, I have to keep reminding myself it really is Friday and not Tuesday. With the added days off from work, courtesy of the days I was gifted off from my boss, my routine has been thrown off a bit. However, I have loved the extra time off to spend with my family. Trust me when I say I am not complaining about feeling like I should be doing Tuesday office duties rather than Friday's!

Last night when I got home, Michael was putting the finishing touches on dinner. I helped dish it out to the children and once dinner was completed, I offered to do the dishes. Mike laughed and said, "Nice. You work all day and then get stuck doing dishes after dinner."

I laughed and replied, "I like doing dishes. There is something about having my hands in hot water that helps me gel my rambling thoughts." It is true. I don't know why doing dishes has that calming almost grounding affect on me, but it does. Even though I have a dishwasher in our new place, I still hand wash the dishes. I have found the dishwasher is the perfect place to put everything to dry. We truly only have enough plates, bowls and cups to serve everyone once. Doing things this way saves me time and energy as well as space. I don't have to put everything away in a cabinet. What would be the point? We will be dragging the dishes out again in a few short hours!

As I was washing dishes, I began unfolding the events and conversations with others I had had over the last couple of days. I was reflecting on how a persons viewpoint changes what they actually see. When that epiphany hit me, I had what I refer to as flashes of insight. I quickly went to my bedroom, pulled out a notepad from my nightstand, and wrote the word viewpoint down before it faded from my brain and then went back to washing dishes.

Usually when I have flashes of insight, if I'm on my game, I find myself writing a blog about all I see. As I continued washing the dishes, I reflected on viewpoints and how sometimes our own viewpoint can actually blind us to certain truths. Suddenly, my mind longed to see things from God's viewpoint. What a view that must truly be!

Many times, when my brain has flashes of insight, I ponder on them. I was appreciating the fact that no two people see something in the exact same way. This point can be made by reading eye witness accounts from a vehicle accident or a crime scene. I have always found this truth fascinating. It was while reflecting upon these things, that the above title for this blog came to me. The night was winding down and honestly I was exhausted and in much need of what I refer to as veg time. I quickly jotted down the title and threw my notepad into my carry case knowing I would blog upon it today.

Do you see what I see? I can remember playing this game as a child. Who knew it would take on such a grander meaning in adulthood? I mean in all honesty, sometimes I look at something and a certain part of it stands out bigger than the rest, yet when I go back to share it with someone, I am almost blind to the thing that originally jumped out at me. This happens the most often when it comes to reading something and then later attempting to share what I read with someone else. I have told myself again and again that I should keep a highlighter on hand for such times! Then it would be easy to re-spot and share down the road. However, I am a mom of many. Things like highlighters are harder to keep hidden away from little ones than treats! Just being able to have a pen or pencil in a given moment can often be a challenge. I cannot tell you how many times I have jotted a note down with a crayon!

We all have our own viewpoints. Everyone has their own set of biases that they base their beliefs upon. Trying to help someone see things from your vantage point is not always easy. If they are closed minded the task becomes that much more difficult. As we grow and mature often our viewpoints shift and even change completely. This mere fact alone may be why some are afraid to open their minds enough to listen to what someone else has to share.

Recently, I came under attack from another person online. They accused me of harming others by sharing my faith. They called me lazy, stupid, slow, and ignorant among other names.

It never ceases to amaze me how some people, while in the process of trying to convince you that your belief system is built on a faulty foundation, find the need to be so abusive. Often, when you point out the truth that there is no reason to be so cruel to get one's opinion across, they truly seem to be blind to their own verbal abuse.

I truly thank God that I am who I am and that I am discovering who I am in Christ for I can honestly say I like myself. This alone helps me rise above such situations to the point that I find myself being led by the spirit to pray for those that attempt to insult me or cause me harm. I see that they are lacking truth and light in their life and I know full well how living outside of either of those feels.

There is definitely something to be said for walking in the spirit. It helps you rise above such situations. I think one might often find themselves in a petty exchange of words in the midst of such assaults were they not wearing the recommended daily armor required for such attacks. This is not to claim that I myself never stumble. It just does not feel good when those moments take place and very quickly the spirit of rightousness convicts me.

I know for me, my heart physically ached for this particular person. I have never met them face to face, and most likely never will. I found it interesting that I went to bed feeling sorry for them and awoke to find myself being led by the spirit to pray for them.

This, among other things, was what I was reflecting upon when the whole viewpoint and do you see what I see notion came to me.

I pray that no matter where you are at in life that you are open enough to try to see things from another person's viewpoint. If you are not willing to truly hear what they are saying, how do you ever hope to be able to have an impact upon their viewpoint. You must know where a person is before you can see how you might best be able to make a point or even better plant a seed. This does not mean you will have a positive effect on every person you attempt to lift. Sadly, when you read your bible, you know clearly some will not be moved.

It is not our place to judge others. We cannot change who they are. Only them being open to the spirit can do that. I try to remind myself to toss seeds regardless of my own shallow thoughts. As the parable about the seeds being thrown onto the ground suggests, some will take root and some will not. It is not my place to judge the ground which I throw them on. I am to throw them regardless of what I am able to see and trust that the spirit will do the rest.

I have found my own truest protection lies in my walking in the spirit as well as continually renewing my mind with God's word. I believe I encourage others and perhaps help them with the strengthening of their faith by sharing my life story. I also believe when we are able to love others in spite of how they treat us, we shine a light into the darkest corners of the world.

Today I pray for the blind and for those who believe that God and religion go hand in hand. Nothing in life makes me sadder than a person without hope or faith. I see them as a dieing flower that is in much need of nourishment. I am so thankful that even in the pit of hell I never doubted you were my creator Father. How blessed I have been all my life to know you truly exist. I pray for all who believe in you but have fallen for the lie that we are not good enough to be loved by you. Thank you for lifting me so high that I was able to see and grasp this truth. It was a real game changer. I can never thank you enough for that game change. I pray for more strength and more wisdom for myself. I only long to be the brightest light I can be. I thank you Father for all the blessings you bestow upon me and my family in a given day. I truly see myself as blessed. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

Wendy Glidden, walks with God
Mom of Many

© Wendy Glidden

My Savior Lives, My Savior Loves, My Savior's Always Been for Me!

Hello! I hope the day has found you with a smile on your face, a light in your eyes and a bounce in your step! If not, hopefully what I have been given to share today will change that! I was on my way to work this morning listening to K-love and as this song began to play, big as day, I had my alphabet picture blow up in front of my eyes enlarging the next verse I needed to write on. If you have been following my blog you know that I have written on A - H to date. I have read what is under letter I a couple of times over the last few days and wondered when I would be inspired to blog on the verse. Today is that day. I am thrilled to introduce to you first the song that inspired the flash. It is "My Savior My God" by Aaron Shust.

And next, today's bible verse from my alphabet picture above my desk. It is taken from Psalms, Chapter 4, verse 8:

I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O Lord make me dwell in safety.

With the world being in the state it is in, I find much comfort in this verse.  A couple of years ago, when there was much talk about the end of the world as we know it, on a few occasions I found myself in a discussion group with several people.  They were discussing the best ways to ensure their food supply as well as safety should the worst come to pass. In the midst of all these great provisional ideas that were being shared, I would chime in with this: "All that sounds great should we be able to stay close to where we currently are. The likelihood of that being the case is not certain so I'm just going to pray that God throws me some manna from heaven. He's the only true protection I can count on." 

Throughout all the various conversations I have been a part of over the last two years, some have chuckled. Someone once stopped talking and stared at me as if I was speaking in another language. The best response in my mind was when I had a guy high five me and say, "I love that. That's what I'm talking about." He was a fan of Ron Paul. I have been a fan of Ron Paul since I first researched him during the 2008 presidential election. He has written several enlightening books on what goes on behind the curtain. If you are into politics he is hands down someone that should have caught your attention for he stands apart from the majority of representatives we are presented with as candidates especially when you take a deeper look at what he stands for. I find it absolutely hilarious that our news crews called him a kook among other unkind names when he was a Presidential Candidate during the 2008 election. However, once the election was over, they had him on as a knowledgeable source for questions regarding our economy! The irony of the situation did not escape me!

We turned off the TV in our household in April of 2008. Mike and I came to the certain belief that 96% of what came out of the TV had a negative tone to it. Not a good percentage to win 'front and center time' in any household, let alone mine. Today I have no idea how I ever had time to watch it. I know one thing for certain, I don't miss it. You would be amazed at how much your children don't know they 'need' when they are no longer being feed soundbites every day. I often refer to the TV now as white noise. I would encourage you to turn it off for one month and see for yourself if anything changes in your home. 

With all that being said, I end today's post with the acknowledgement of how freeing it is to KNOW 100% that God has this. I don't need to understand everything about God. I don't have to defend his existence. I simply am blessed to have testimonies to share with my brothers and sisters. I too know how dark some of the roads we walk down can be. I've walked many of them myself. I am so blessed to have sought God and His advice, for when you seek, you will always find. The more you seek, the more you find. The more you find the more you seek. Until one day you see things shrouded in Heavenly lights so bright it takes your breath away and leaves you in a state of awe. When you get here, you will experience such a freedom, you will finally understand rest! Brace yourself though for Satan does not want you to remain in that state of mind. He will come at you in ways you have yet to experience. Remember to lean on your Heavenly Father. He is faithful. He will always see you through. 

Today I pray countless begin to seek you Father. I pray they seek you daily. I pray they sing your praises morning, noon and night. I know how faithful you are. May they come to know this as well. How blessed I am to have felt so tangibly your love for me. I thank you for that. I am in awe of your love for me. How I am counted as righteous still baffles my mind. How loving and gracious you are! Thank you. I pray more of my sleeping brothers and sisters awaken and step into action. I pray they hear your voice and recognize the signs you send them. I pray I recognize the signs you flash before me. I pray for more signs! I thank you for past signs. How they caused me to lift my head. I pray for your protection when it comes to those the evil one and those unfortunate souls he has connived, deceived and lied to. As you promise the enemy is crushed under my feet, let me never fall victim to him. Protect my heart and my mind Father as only you can. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

Wendy, Mom of Many

© Wendy Glidden, 2013

Children of Divorce or Those With Two Homes

I have had to pray long and hard on where my blog seemed to be heading. I had to make sure it was not about me and my hurts but what I am meant to expose from darkness to light. I want you to know I do not despise Jeff at all anymore. There was a time I could not stand him for what he had put me through. Thank God I am beyond that. Time really does have a way of healing all wounds.

I myself am a child of divorce. My father and mother married at a young age due to my conception. My brother followed me by a mere 10 months 10 days. Stress over finances I am sure did not help my parents. My father left us when I was only 3 years old. I did not see him again until I was close to 5. By age 7, I had been informed by my step mother how unworthy my mother was of my father's devotion. In response to something I had questioned, my mother unloaded a few things off her chest regarding my father. My point here is simply this. That was too much for a child!

My grandmother attempted to clear the muddy water for me by pointing out how young my parents were and how out of line Chris had been with her list of faults regarding my mother. I knew by age 10 this was something I never wanted to do to any child of mine should I have the burden of raising a child of divorce. This was such a big deal to me that when newly married to Jeff we had a discussion how if we did not work out, we were promising each other NOT to do this to our child. It is easy to promise something like that when you are getting along. It is harder to follow through when in the heat of the moment.

If you are a parent that has fallen out of love and are pursuing or have already gotten a divorce from your spouse, I beg you, rise above your own hurt, pain, anguish and judgement. You will Harm YOUR relationship with your child if you talk negatively about their other parent. You may win their love by destroying the other parent but it is Love by deceit. It will not last. Time will reveal truths. It does NOT matter how YOU feel about your ex. YOU don't have the right to bring up their weaknesses to your children. Eventually your child will grow up and they will begin to see things through a new lens. Trust me when I say you don't want to be on the end of judgement and anger from  your child because you felt it necessary to spout off about what a jerk, a looser, a cheater, a rotten provider THEIR father or mother was in YOUR eyes. You are doing yourself and your child as well as your ex a gigantic dis-service with this type of behavior.

I had the pleasure of having this confirmed by my oldest son recently. He thanked me for NOT tearing His Father down. He also mentioned how he had felt robbed of his relationship with me in his youth because of what His Father had told him. Turns out my son sees me for who I have always been. Praise God, I have been redeemed of all the lies and deceit and not by my own defense.

I know fully well how hard it is to bite your tongue when your child is informing you of your faults and failures according to your ex spouse. Especially when some of it is so far stretched from the truth that you find yourself biting your tongue til it bleeds. I know how the heat of that moment causes the human side of you to long to get up on your own soap box to defend yourself. I thank God for showing me how detrimental this type of behavior is. I mentioned once in one of my first few blogs how I wrote down what type of parent I wanted to be when God called me at a young age and informed me I would be a mother to many. This was one of the promises I made to myself. No matter how angry I was at the Father of my children, I would not tear him down in front of my children. EVEN if they stooped to that level, I would not. I stumbled a little when it came to the Father of my 4th and 5th babies. Children lurk around the corner. I warn you to guard your tongue and emotions if your children are close by. In time I will share how this made me feel. Let's just say none of it was warm and fuzzy!

I would also encourage anyone going through divorce to not use your children as pawns. Do not get in the way of your child's relationship with the opposing parent. It's not your place. If you have a spouse that is abusive pray for them. Pray they never hurt your child. The courts are not the greatest at protection. Remember you cannot control everything that goes on during visitation but you can keep your eyes and ears open. Keep a journal if you have just cause to worry. Ask questions wisely. Keep your focus on your child and not the other parent.

You should also know children of divorce have an edge over their parents. Yes. You heard me. We have an edge. If you stoop so low as to inform us of how you feel about the opposing parent, we will one day use this to our advantage. We will brag on how awesome the other parent is or how they do certain things for us. Some of it may not even be true. Stand firm in your own parenting and pray for strength. You are going to need it!

As I end this chapter I am going to leave you with this: It has been flashed to me several times that what was too much for Bruce was the craziness that was continuing between Jeff and I where our children were concerned. The last time I saw Bruce was after we had tracked down, found and removed Cassy and Billy from Jeff's new wife's care. They had up and moved during the children's summer visit. It was Jeff's mom that had alerted me to the situation. I will blog in detail what happened soon. I don't know how it took me so long to realize why Bruce ran and blocked contact. I get it today. I am still praying on revealing these shoes I walked in.

I leave you with this favorite phrase of mine. I came up with it when I walked out on Mike last November. I think I am going to use it as a title chapter . . . it is a bit long but I have been saying it for six months now. "You don't have to be beat up to be beat down."

Today I pray for all children of divorce. I pray for all parents going through the process and those still licking their wounds. I pray you rise above your pain. I pray you seek wisdom on the best way to raise your child or children in a split home. I pray you have strength to get through all the situations that come your way. I pray that you are able to resist tearing your spouse down to gain your child's love. Father I come to you today and ask you to meet those in their pain and lift them. Fill single mother's and father's with strength, peace and wisdom. Fill the children with your Love. In Jesus name I pray. Amen

Wendy, Mom of Many

© Wendy Glidden 2013