Saying Goodbye To Amanda Rose Glidden

My last blog titled "The Only Baby I Ever Planned" ended  with me having a meeting with my first choice when it came to the parents that would raise my baby. This was the last paragraph of that blog:     

                My baby's adoptive mom looked at me and asked if I knew the gender and I told

                her no. She confided she would love a little girl but would be just as thrilled with

                a little boy. She was beaming as if she were carrying my child inside of her. She

                next asked if I'd be okay with her touching my stomach and I said she could. My

                baby moved and she got to feel it. Her eyes filled with tears and she said, "Thank

                You" in the most sincerely loving way a human being could say to another human

                 being.

I only remember attempting to smile at her. What she said next, I was not expecting. She leaned in a little closer almost as if it was a confidential promise, "What ever name you pick will remain the name of your baby." My world rocked. I had not allowed myself to pick names . . . boys or girls. That knowledge sank in. I don't remember how I got to the meeting and I don't remember how I got home. It's all blank. It was late November / Early December. 

I tried to keep my mind off the baby as much as a pregnant woman can. I kept busy. My mom had a paper route . .. . 3 routes actually. All 3 of them were walking routes. Every other day I delivered the papers. It was part of my family duty. I enjoyed it. Fresh air. Exercise. I kept my mind focused on apartment buildings and who in each building got the paper. On Sundays we did the route together. It was good. One of the few times in my life up to now that my mom and I got along. 

My original due date was March 6th, my birthday. They moved it back to March 24th. I arranged for Jeff, Cassy and William's father, to take the children the weekend before my due date. I told him I would need him and his mom to keep them for 3 weeks. I woke up in labor on April 3, 1991, right in time for the paper route to be delivered. My mom checked my contractions and they were over seven minutes apart. My mom went to deliver the papers and I called Lena to have her come sit with me.

By the time Mom got back from delivering papers it was time to head to the hospital. We got there and checked in. I was settled into a delivery room. A nurse came in and asked if I wanted an epidural. I said I did as I wanted to feel NOTHING. She assured me I'd be able to push but I wouldn't feel pain.I was asked if I wanted to hold the baby after it was born. I said no. I was too afraid to do that.  I don't remember much about what we talked about while we waited. I remember someone coming in and checking on my progress and she popped my water. She stated that would speed things up and my mom said, "Boy will it ever". When she walked toward the door, my mom questioned, "Where are you going?" She informed my mother I was at least an hour away from delivering and she walked out of the room. Not even ten minutes later my mom ran out into the hallway to announce that the baby was coming and we needed assistance. As often has happened when I deliver things are not in order and it gets pretty crazy. In no time flat I gave birth to a 9lb 6oz baby girl. The doctor held up my baby and announced, "We have a baby girl."

I was taken clear on the other side of the hospital as I had requested not to be in the maternity ward. Lena came with me. When my nurse came to check on me, I asked if it was okay if I walked around. She said if you feel up to it but be careful. I said I would. When she left, I looked at Lena and said, "I can't stand it. You want to go see her?" Of course Lena did. We went out of my room smiled at the girls at the desk went around the corner and into the elevator. We went down and then across to the maternity ward through a tunnel. I would say it's a REALLY good Walk! The nurse in the nursery was just getting ready to feed her and she asked if I would like to feed her. I could not stop myself. I had to hold her. I fed her, I admired her, I sang to her, I breathed in her newborn sent. Every fiber of my being wanted to keep her in my arms. Right then I looked up and my nurse was looking at me through the glass motioning me to come out. She greeted me with a wheel chair and said, "Child when I said you could walk around, I did not mean for you to take a mile hike. You could bleed to death. We need to check on you come on. I gave Amanda back to the nursery nurse and climbed in the chair. 

I went back again and again to hold her and feed her. I thought long and hard about what to name her. I always loved the name Amanda and hadn't picked that before because Jeff's sister already had an Amanda. For her middle name I decided on Rose. It was my Grandmother's first name and I thought that she was as beautiful as a rose. I filled out her birth certificate and filled out the final paperwork numbly. I was informed they had received Bruce's sign off. I knew that they had found him for he called me only one other time than the time to tell me goodbye. He wanted to know if the adoption papers were the real deal or if I was trapping him into paying child support. I told him I was giving the baby up the papers were not a trick. I was shocked they had found him then but not when they told me he had signed off. 

I was released 24 hours before Amanda. I came back to hold her. I had kept my bracelet on. When I went back the second time thinking I would be able to give her one last feeding, I was informed I had just missed her by fifteen minutes. I fell apart. I am a complete utter mess as I type. I must end here for I feel as if my chest is going to explode out of my chest from such fierce pain. 

Today I pray for all birth moms whose hearts ache. May our baby's know we loved them. May they never doubt that. May we feel at peace with our decisions. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

Wendy, 

Mom of many

The Only Baby I Ever Planned

My last blog titled "I'm Learning to Be the Light" ironically revealed the details of how I came to have my first abortion. If you have been following me from the beginning of my story you know that I am a mother to 9 of my 12 children that God blessed me with. Two of those 12 I elected to not bring into this world and the one in the middle of them I planned to conceive.

To catch you up a little more, I'd blown Jimmy off as well as avoided Richard at every turn until he stopped coming around at all. I was working two jobs and raising two children on my own. The last thing in the world I was looking for was love and that's when I met Bruce Malone. Dark brown hair, gorgeous blue eyes and he stood over 6' tall. He was a walking talking dream of a guy. He was in college and was on the basketball team. He came over to my apartment one night and we ended up hitting it off. Within 3 months of dating Bruce had asked me to marry him. I had said yes. From that point, he non-stop begged me to have a baby with him. I don't know why I thought it would take more than a couple tries for me to get pregnant but it didn't. I was pregnant the same month we began trying.

To save money and get ready to move to Iowa where Bruce was going to college I moved in with my Aunt Janet and my Uncle Bob. Bruce was supposed to be arranging us housing. He only called me once a week to update me on the progress and to see how the baby and I were getting along. Right after Halloween he called and before I had a chance to even say "How are you doing?", he said, "Wendy, I need to say this so just listen. I love you. I will always love you. This is too much. I'm not ready. My mom has moved and she changed her number, the college has moved me to a new dorm and they have been informed that you are not to have my new information. Don't bother my friends they too have been warned. Good Luck." and he hung up on me.

I was frozen. I think I dropped the phone. Instantly my Aunt knew something was wrong. Through my tears I shared what Bruce had said. She thought it might be in my best interest to go over to my Uncle Jeff's house and talk to him and his wife. They lived about 15 minutes away.Jeff and Lena, while technically my Aunt and Uncle, are basically my age. Jeff has always been more like a brother to me. Getting in the car was likely not the wisest thing for me to do, but the children did not need to see me fall into a shamble of tears.

I really don't remember what all transpired over the next week or so other than the repo man showed up and towed off my car. I had not made a payment in 3 months. With no car, no soon to be husband, no job, my Aunt Janet had a heart to heart talk with me during nap time.

She asked me some really pointed questions. Seeing how I had struggled on my own with two children how did I think I would be able to provide for three on my own? She asked if I could honestly say I would never blame this child for how my life turned out. She asked if I thought it was fair to raise a baby on my own knowing her father wanted nothing to do with her? In the end I decided that the fairest thing for all of the children would be to give this baby to someone who was longing for a baby of their own to raise.

I contacted an adoption agency that allowed me to pick who the parents of my baby were going to be. I started with countless applications. Read resume after resume. In the end I narrowed it down to three and then put them in order of my first choice to my third choice. I requested to meet them before making my final decision. You get a much better feel for a person in person than you do off paper.

I did not know the baby I was carrying was a girl at this point. I did not know her gender until she was born. I didn't want to know. I knew me. Better not to know. What I did know was I wanted this baby to have a sibling for if I had kept him or her, they would not have been an only child. I wanted the couple I chose to know God. The couple I chose had a 4 year old boy and they wanted him to have a sibling. It was obvious that there was belief of God in their home just by their file. When I met with them, they promised to send me pictures of my baby for the first year. I could mail in pictures to the adoption agency and letters for them to keep in a file for my baby if I wanted to. They promised me when he/she turned 18 they would allow him/her to search for me if that was his/her desire. I told the mediator of the meeting that I was happy with them and they were the ones I wanted to gift with my child.

My baby's adoptive mom looked at me and asked if I knew the gender and I told her no. She confided she would love a little girl but would be just as thrilled with a little boy. She was beaming as if she were carrying my child inside of her. She next asked if I'd be okay with her touching my stomach and I said she could. My baby moved and she got to feel it. Her eyes filled with tears and she said, "Thank You" in the most sincerely loving way a human being could say to another human being.

I am in convulsions crying and must stop. I knew this was going to be painful . . . I can barely breathe . . . I promise to come back and finish this chapter quicker than what I have been blogging lately. Some roads are harder to travel down than others.

Today I pray for all women and all babies, longed for, miscarried, aborted, adopted and cherished alike. I pray for any and all the broken hearts. I give thanks that I know my children I gave back to God are with God as all unborn babies are. I pray peace over all with aching hearts. In Jesus name I pray.

Wendy, Mom of Many

A Song to Share on This Tremendously Thankful Thoughtful Thursday!

I heard this song last night on my way to my meeting with my Life Coach . . . my spiritual advisor . . . my friend . . . she has pushed me to reach for my dreams and become confident in my self worth . . . I love her.  When this song came on the radio it was the first time I had ever heard it. I listened to the words and I felt chills. The lyrics in this song reiterate what I have been praying about to God. I don't want to do anything to turn someone away from Him. I want them to see His Glory through me and be drawn to Him. It's my heart's desire.

I hope this link works . . .  http://youtu.be/yXotFpdX1V0

I updated Cathy, my life coach, on what all had happened in my life for the last 4 weeks. She really should charge me more! I was in her office for over two hours!! I guess I had a lot happen in one month! She gave me an assignment as she always does. I would be so much further back without her encouragement. I look back to the first group session she hosted that I attended. It was a transformation class she teaches. I exploded in growth! From there she reached out and inquired how I was doing. She offered to give me a little one on one coaching and it was a mere month later that I began blogging. Cathy is a mighty prayer warrior. Don't ever think prayer is not effective. It is!

I am excited to see how I grow this next month. I have so much of my story left to share. I need to get to the next chapter but all in due time. Those words aren't at my finger tips yet!

Today I pray that I indeed become a tool for God. I pray I remain open to His voice and only speak words that bring any and all who hear what I say and read what I write closer to our Eternal Father.  I pray those in the midst of a spiritual battle find fellow warriors to stand at their sides and encourage them in their faith. I pray for protection for those that minister to others. In Jesus name I pray.

Wendy, mom of many

Copyright © 2013 Wendy L Glidden. All Rights Reserved.

 

I'm Learning to Be the Light!

Good morning Everyone!! It's Tremendously Thankful Thoughtful Thursday ♥ I heard this song that talks about learning to be the light last night on my way to dinner with Brenda . . . it's how I feel . . . it's what I feel I am already becoming . . . So today I am Thankful for sisters and brothers in Christ. I am Tremendously Thankful for Grace ♥. As we go about our day lets be thoughtful of others. We all walk in awful uncomfortable even restricting shoes throughout our various season of life . . . today reflect upon that!

Here is the link to the song I was talking about! http://youtu.be/6bRMemJf5EQ

So here I was on my way to work this morning and I was thinking about all the cool stuff I get to do today. I hang out with my small group and we are studying Acts right now. I'm totally loving it. On Sunday we just started Hebrews. Two awesome encouraging books in the Holy Bible! For me the Good News proclaimed throughout the New Testament has been life changing. I finally get it. I am a new creation. I will have eternal life. I am forgiven of my trespasses. It's a new day! I will boast in that truth until my last moment.

How awesome to be able to spread the good news. Especially when it comes to a sinner like me. I used to shrink when people would say something about me being a Saint due to all the children I have had. It made me feel like such a fraud. I felt nothing like a Saint for decades. I was my biggest critic. I gave the evil one plenty of ammunition to fire against me.

Nothing like helping the destroyer of lives destroy you! Now when I find myself shrinking from something or having a moment of fear I swell with confidence. I say, "Oh. . . Satan . . . man you are good. You had me for a millisecond and then I saw my fear for what it was . . . it's actually you being afraid of others seeing my light!"

I refuse to not live my life for Christ and that means I will face all my fears head on and with confidence. My God is Bigger than all else! So funny another one of my favorite songs (I only have a gazillion of them) just started on the radio.

 "The God of Angel Armies" here is a link for it:  http://youtu.be/VzIABaImiK4  yes it's looking like a music day isn't it?!

I guess that's a good thing. What is it that they say about music? Something like it soothes the savage beast. For me it helps light me up. I heard another tune today on my way to work that led me to know that today is the day I share one of my darkest moments. It's about how we don't fall in an instant . . . how what used to be black and white slowly becomes gray . . . and instantly I was flashing on my past and the song holds a lot of truth. I didn't change overnight . . . it was with each bad choice I made, I seemed to drift farther and farther away from the path I thought I was going to take. Over the course of time I had convinced myself I could never return to that path and that is when God began calling me home. I was shown the message of Grace and learned about the Truth of Jesus. With that being said, let's get these dark ages of mine on paper.

Before my divorce was finalized with Jeff I had let it be VERY known to him that I wanted no more children.  When I went in for my 4 week checkup after having William I had asked about having my tubes tied. It was then that I learned by law I could not have the procedure done until I was either 25 or had given birth to 3 children. I was so upset. I remember yelling at God about it. Jeff decided to have a procedure done so that he could not have any more children. He did this when we were separated. I remember telling him, "If you are doing this in hopes that we will get back together then it is for the wrong reasons. If you go through with this I don't ever want it to be thrown in my face. Understand this will not win my love." He claimed he didn't want anymore children. Two were more than enough. He went through with the procedure. I have often wondered how he feels about me having had all of these other children. Life is Ironic.

So, as I ended my blog titled "How I became a Single Mother" my divorce was finalized in December of 1989.  To me this meant I could freely date Jimmy. He was working at UPS and going to college so his time for me was short and usually at crazy hours. We had been seeing each other for about two months when I called over to his house to let him know I had the weekend off and it was Jeff's weekend with the kids. This was a BIG occasion! His father answered and was kind enough to inform me he was on a date with his fiancee. My world reeled. One of my friends worked at Apple Bees . . . I wiped away my tears and went up to hang out in her station. When I got there one of her fellow buds was working. He was a nice guy and he had been interested in me. He caught me crying and he put everything he had into cheering me up. Over the course of the weekend he hung out with me and we ended up sleeping together. It was the first time I'd ever had an orgasm. Blew my mind! I suddenly for the first time in my life realized what all the excitement was all about when it came to sex! Richard made me feel so special he was a great friend and a caring considerate man. We began hanging out the rest of the week when our schedules allowed it. My cycle should have started the following week but the time went by without a visit from Aunt Rose. I took a pregnancy test and it turned out to be positive. . .

This next truth is so awful I know it is what held me back from telling this story. I had been with two men in one month. I had no idea who the father was. It gets better, I was worried about how I would be judged for not knowing who the father was. It gets even better than that. Jimmy was white & Richard was black. Once the baby was born there would be no question. I was not sure I could endure the in-between of not knowing who the father was. Jimmy was engaged to another woman and honestly I had no desire to tell him I was pregnant and did not know if it was his or not. I did tell Richard about my dilemma. After all, he was my friend. He offered me an "easy" solution. He would pay for my abortion. Even though I knew it was wrong to take a life I convinced myself it was acceptable. At the time the mantra was "This is your life" or "This is your body and your life". It was an acceptable thing to do. I honestly want to puke reliving this because there was nothing okay about what I did. I knew life began at conception. I took the easy way out. In the long run it was something that would haunt me for years and years.

My friend Donna, the same Donna I ran away with and who I was beat up over, drove me to the clinic and stayed with me. The entire waiting room was full of women waiting their turn. You signed in and then you went and saw a counselor. I honestly don't know what the point of that was because there was no counseling. I felt like I was in some weird dream. I was called back to the room for the procedure and it was awful and painful. Worse than childbirth. It felt like I was being ripped apart. Now we know what happens to the baby inside of you during this process. I cannot tell you how Satan used that against me.

Richard came and stayed with me that first night. I howled in pain. I thought for sure I was dying. I know part of me wanted to die. Richard and I had been great friends. I used to wonder what ever happened to us. Now I know. I pushed him away. Looking at him was too big of a reminder of my deed.

Jimmy called me after my abortion. He had enrolled in the Navy. I was so mad at him I told him I had been pregnant with his child and I had fallen and miscarried. If he reads this blog of mine, it will be the first time he has heard the truth about this pregnancy. I was angry at him. At the time I blamed him for my emptiness. I reasoned, had he not deceived me, I would have never found myself weak and looking for love in all the wrong places. Please don't misunderstand what I am saying. This is Not an excuse. I am just showing how far I had gone down the wide road. I wanted him to hurt. That is not our purpose here on earth. However, it was where I was at by my own doing mind you.

This is just the beginning of my Dark Ages. I am not proud of my past decisions. I do KNOW that God uses all evils for good. I know he is going to use my pain to minister to other lost souls. I am going to be a willing participant in that ministry.

Today I pray for those who have made the same choice I did. I pray that you are brought into the light and shown the truth. I also pray for those facing the decision of what to do when you find yourself pregnant and it was not your plan to become that way. I pray you are touched by a believer so deeply that you never have to face the demon of regret. I pray for all who want a baby yet cannot conceive. I thank God for Christ. I thank God for Grace. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

I will leave you with one last song . . . it's the one I heard on the way to work. The title is "Slow Fade" http://youtu.be/dUa8FSVv5Ag


Wendy,

Mom of Many

Copyright © 2013 Wendy L Glidden. All Rights Reserved.

Wild Wacky Wonderful Weds! Boy is it Ever!!

Good Morning Everyone! Today is Wild Wacky Wonderful Wednesday and boy is it ever! March 13th and I walked out the door into a mini snowflake snow storm! Is that groundhog wacky or what? Little prankster. . . gotta admit these last couple of year the weather has been interesting . . . with all the computer technology our forecasters get it wrong . . . what makes us so interested in where this guys shadow falls?

This month I have something going on every night. Tonight I get the honor of hanging out with the incredible Brenda E Taylor. It is our 4th meeting! Brenda created an online Group called The Journey of Women. We are not big yet but we are dedicated to making a difference. This is our Facebook page. http://www.facebook.com/groups/274161102711294/ She has a mission in mind. If you are a woman in any walk of life looking for a place to make lifelong true-blue friends we invite you to join us tonight for dinner and conversation! All I know is it’s on US 40 on the East side and we are meeting at this AWESOME Mexican restaurant. The food is delicious and the company will be downright real.

Guess this is kind of a long status post but today is going to take me by storm and I intend to ride it out calmly . . . who knows if I’ll get back to facebook today so . . .If you have nothing else to do but watch TV, why not come out and join us? For information either friend Brenda or message me or like her page and leave a message!

** This was my status update today on facebook. STATUS UPDATE . . . I think I issue news bulletins! I really am excited about meeting with Brenda again this month. She is down to earth. I was drawn to her the first time we sat in a meeting for Christian Women's Business Connection. The leader of that group is Cathy Padgett. She is my life coach! I love her. She prays for me and motivates me to reach for the stars. She is the one who helped me capture the negative soundtrack loop that was playing out in my head daily. I promise you, life changes when you put a little focus on the thoughts that whisper across your brain during the day. I look back over the last 6 months and I am left grinning. 

You see, I have stepped so far out of my comfort zone it has completely changed my life and everything about it. It was the spark that started the flywheel. If you are unhappy with one element of your life I encourage you to get more active in your life.  Do something that will draw you out of your shell. I admit it going to places where a lot of busy people are frightens the heck out of me. I don't even know why. Once I get settled in I'm fine. I have figured out that being me is perfectly okay. I like myself. Why wouldn't others? 

I'm not sure where this confident Wendy has been over the years but I'm happy she found her source of strength again! Yes, I did talk in 3rd person ha ha . . . sometimes it's just the best way to get the point across at how even you notice a difference in yourself . . . almost as if before you were hanging out with a different person. 

** As promised, here is the update on my YMCA experience: I am excited. Amazing how less overwhelming a facility becomes once you have the full tour and understand how and where everything is. The place is endless and the rooms for my children to access are rocking! I have two hours of childcare available every day except Sunday. I was absolutely elated again last night. I was promised a wellness assessment by next week which include setting up a workout plan for myself as well as an explanation on how to use the machines! Even cooler my information gets plugged into this program and the machines are tied into it so that I keep an actual true log of my activity! Oh yea, a little accountability never hurt anyone! Last night I walked on the treadmill for 1/2 an hour again. It's the only machine I have braved. Monday I walked 1.3 miles and last night I walked 1.4 miles. Even cooler, I was more relaxed last night and even managed how to figure out how to input my weight into the machine so it calculated how many calories I burned! After my walk and cool down I went over to the subway inside the Y and ate a tuna sandwich loaded with spinach, onions, black olives, tomatoes, banana peppers and jalapenos. Yum! Then I changed into my swimsuit and went to the Hot Tub. The jets are so powerful I'm telling you it's heavenly. 

I have a busy day ahead of me . . . I've been slammed via the phones so I apologize if this is a little jumbled. I write as I think . . . you never know what you are going to get! I have been getting flashes of memories the last couple of days so I know I am being prepared to continue on my story and enter the dark ages once and for all. 

Today I pray you step out of your comfort zone in some way. I pray it starts a spark that fires a flywheel of movement for you. I pray that you put yourself out there for honest friendship possibilities. I pray that you become more active in multiple ways. I pray you begin to enjoy life and see the beauty in living it to the fullest. I pray you draw closer to God and lean upon his strength. I pray you too realize there is no cause for fear. Our God is bigger than anything! I pray you begin to see the beauty in your life and you begin to give thanks. Today I also pray for all believers of Christ. I pray We step up and get active in spreading the good news. We can't do that closed up inside hiding our light from the world. I pray all believers wake up and get in motion. Today I thank Our Heavenly Father for so many blessings He has bestowed upon me and all the blessings yet to come my way. I love my life. I know my purpose. I plan on enjoying my mission and I'm so thankful that I was chosen for this life. What an incredible life it has been thus far. Thank you Father. In Jesus name I pray,

Wendy, Mom of Many


Copyright © 2013 Wendy L Glidden. All Rights Reserved.

Terrific Testimonial Tell All Tuesday! My update for March 12, 2013

Hello Internet World & Fellow Friends! It’s Terrific Testimonial Tell-All Tuesday! Yesterday I went to the YMCA . . . gotta be honest ~ the place overwhelms me. All the machines! I haven’t had to work a TV remote in 5 years let alone a machine that can throw me on the floor!  I found an open machine. I hopped on and luckily it was easy enough to get going. I slowly figured out how to increase the speed and change the slant. I will admit it takes a lot for me to walk. I seriously wanted to cry in four minutes. I always do if I have to walk at a steady pace for long. I am determined to figure out how to change this pain that attempts to rob me of my life. I’m pushing myself through “physical therapy”. I am taking it slow. I don’t need to win a marathon tomorrow. I just need to hit my first goal of walking 3 miles in 30 minutes. Last night I walked 1.3 miles in 30 minutes. I know. NOT impressive. However if you could fathom my pain level I think you might have cause to be amazed. 

Two years ago I was in so much pain I wept myself to sleep most nights . . . no crying . . . no sound . . . I hurt so bad my eyes overflowed and I would pray for a moment of sleep. It’s part of the reason I love Melaleuca so much. My wellness level improved. I was eating better snacks and drinking better drinks due to switching stores. Their Ibuprofen was off the charts rocking better than Advil and the ease level of my life improved vastly. Cleaning EVERYTHING from clothes to the kitchen to the bathroom to the entire house and even the cars became night and day different. I smiled the entire time! Honestly I still do. I’ll see something go in the laundry and I’ll think never in a million years will this come clean and wham it does. You know it rocks when Mike gets excited about how clean his work clothes come! Melaleuca was more than enough to give me hope. I loved them so much I told my close friends and family about them. They all decided to try some items themselves and I began earning another stream of income that I used for massages at this time in my life dressing myself was a chore. Everything I owned was purchased by its ease level. I owned no tennis shoes or any “tie” shoes at all. All my clothes had to be comfy or I might not be able to even get them on. It was through my massage therapist that I learned that my hips had no rotation. Funny to admit it but I did not know that until she pointed it out. My inflammation was so awful in my lower back she insisted I get a full set of ex-rays. She told me I needed to find a chiropractor that offered free ex-rays so she could be assured my tail bone was not broken. It was through my chiropractor that I learned why my head was in so much pain. Right after that I went to my first Melaleuca convention. I don’t know what I thought I was going to get there. College like classes was not what I was expecting but that’s what it was. I learned so much science that weekend I will be a customer for life just for their pharmacy aisle and their absolute dedication to enhancing lives.

I came back from convention pretty excited. I knew a lot more than I did when I left. I began using their vitamins and calcium and the headaches stopped. If I go without the calcium for 10 days they come back with such a force it is scary. I discovered that by accident last year. Trust me when I say I won’t be doing that again anytime soon! The experience gave me respect for their vitality line real freaking quick! When I tell others that you will notice a difference when you switch your brand, I am speaking from a source of Truth!

While the never ending headaches finally ended, my pain in my hips and back was not improving beyond where it had come. My hope of a pain free life was beginning to fade a little bit. One night I prayed asking what I needed to do to feel better. The next morning is when I awoke to the song by Carol King, “Beautiful”. I have thought about that advice almost every day since then. Seriously can you for one second imagine being in bed trying to hang onto those last few seconds of sweet slumber when suddenly an instrumental strikes up. It sounds really awesome but you are not ready for music yet. Once you put your feet on the floor pain rears its ugly head and the battle begins. I blogged on this event earlier. All the details of the song and how I came to realize it was not playing on the radio can be found in the blog titled “Give it to God and Let it Go”. This event happened in November of 2011. Then in February of 2012, I met Margie. She helps run a pain management clinic and she put me on a drink that was being shown to help people with pain. She gave me one bottle to try and told me if I thought it helped I should drink 2 bottles a month and then I could cut back my dosage to as little as one ounce a day. This juice provided me with my first “in color dream” I had had in almost 3 years. It helped me be able to sleep which is the only time your body truly goes to town on healing itself. I improved enough to attempt a yoga class for beginners. It was on my 5^th week of class that my right hip rotated. I laugh when I tell the story now because I was fearful for a split second that my leg was popping out of place. I bumped myself up to a stronger juice thinking maybe the rest of my pain would go away but I noticed no further improvement. Next I quit drinking the juice completely to see if I noticed a back slide. I did not.

I am still full blown in my pursuit to get out of pain and I promise to share all and everything I discover on my journey to total wellness.

I am happy to report that the YMCA director returned my phone call and I am getting a full tour tonight along with a wellness assessment! I will keep you posted on how things go. Perhaps I should do a before photo and a monthly photo so that even I can see any improvement! I have been so busy today. I started this blog in the morning and then was away from it for the majority of the day. I am out of time so this is my post for the day!

Today I pray for all who are in pain. I so understand how life robbing pain is. I pray you find strength in your faith. I pray you start your own journey to wellness. I pray that you never give up hope in better days. In Jesus name I pray. Amen,

Wendy, Mom of Many

Copyright © 2013  Wendy L Glidden  All Rights Reserved.

Fantatically Fun Family Friday! FABULOUS!

Good Morning World! It's Fantastically Fun Family Friday and that puts me in a FABULOUS mood! I am looking forward to some SERIOUS LAUGHTER and relaxation this weekend! I'll be kicking it back with my little ones. We are going to the Y tomorrow. I am going to hit the treadmill again. I finally have a pair of tennis shoes! First pair in over 3 years!!! My birthday gift to myself. I am committed to getting back in shape. This pain stuff is for the birds! I know the kids will want to hit the pool again. I think they are all half fish! I am looking forward to seeing what all we can do as a family there. I just got my membership and have only been there once by myself and once with all the kids By MYSELF! This weekend I'll have some help. I hope you enjoy your family time and are able to slow down the hustle bustle a bit and enjoy this thing we call Life!

My main goal in life is to spread the good news. If you are looking for some encouragement or some honest true life struggle and overcome stories, or perhaps a general boost in your day, I hope you find all of that here. 

I wrote a blog a week ago talking about how "It's all in your mindset" when it comes to how you feel about, and deal with everything that comes your way. This year one of my goals was to focus more on my relationship with Our Heavenly Father. One of the tricks that I used was to rethink how I look at each day of the week. This is why many of my blog titles focus on the day. Doing this allows me to get excited about spending time with my children and helps me remember how quickly time passes so I tend to make the most out of each moment. I have to admit doing things this way has for sure increased the laughter in our home. 

Last weekend, my youngest 3 went to the daddy daughter dance. Trying on dresses and shoes as well as taking them to get their hair done was hectic for sure but because I had thought about the day ahead in a positive manner I think it enabled me to keep the focus on the joy that this day was meant to bring to the girls. I took the two youngest boys out for mom and son time and we had some good laughs. I am going to try to add some pics and videos to this blog today to share with you a snippet of the joy my life is beginning to overflow with simply by focusing daily on God's Word as well as Recognizing the TRUTH about Jesus and Grace. I hope these give you cause to giggle . . . laughter is the best medicine!

  Adding pics is NOT easy!

 I have fought with this blog for an hour trying to put these in order! Obviously failing big time!! I was trying to upload some video too . . . not going very well . . . I think I sent it to Youtube lol. I will play havoc trying to find it I'm sure! I hope everyone has a Fantastic Fun Family Friday this week. Remember tomorrow is another day to celebrate life!

Oh my . . . I cannot get anything to work for me now. God only knows what this will look like when published! Today I pray that we learn to relax and not let the little irritations like photos not dropping like you want them to get the best of you! I pray we all laugh a little hardier and enjoy the moments we are given. I pray we all make the most of each day here on earth and draw closer in relationship with Our Heavenly Father through Christ. In Jesus name I pray, Wendy, Mom of many!


Copyright © 2013 Wendy L Glidden. All Rights Reserved.

My Re-birthday Gift From My Heavenly Father!

Good Morning! Today the date is 3/6/2013! By age I turned 44 this year but by life's standards I have just been reborn! Numbers intrigue me. I love how with math the answer is the answer. It is cut and dry. It allows no doubt. You can calculate it forwards and backwards and you end with the same result. Then there are patterns in your life that numbers seem to highlight. For instance my birthday when written as 3/6/69 is dividable by 3. The letters in my entire name total to 15. My weight at birth was 8.04. it seems 3 has followed me around a lot!

The funniest 3 I saw in my life recently was when my friend Joan here at work and I had purchased some hot and sour soup from the Chinese restaurant down the street. Neither one of us could finish ours so she informed me she was labeling them and putting them in the fridge. When I went to go get mine later that day after Joan had left, I looked at the labels she had made. Instantly I was thinking why did she label them 3 & 4? Suddenly I realized I was looking at them wrong . . . They actually were a W and a J . . . gave me a pretty good giggle though.

So . . . numbers . . . sometimes I think God uses them to get our attention. You see. He led me to open this blog forum up . . . I was completely lost through the Title and Url process. I was lost but I just listened to what the Holy Spirit led me to do. On December 6th, I wrote my first blog. Today I am writing my 44th blog and it is my 44th birthday! I have been focused on listening and following God and reading his word more than ever over these last 90 days.

This year I attended an event called "The Great Banquet". It was the 44th one held at CrossRoads. When I went into the weekend I had published 40 blogs. Sometimes we pray for signs. Just let me know you are there God. I may be counted as crazy but the number 3,4 and 40 are big repeaters in the Bible. You could say God has my full attention!

One of my biggest struggles over the years would have to be my faith when it came to Jesus. Over the last 3 years I have gotten into the word and I have learned all about Jesus with the help of the Holy Spirit and fellow believers in Christ. I thank God for leading me to this fellowship. I see his handy work all over my travels. This Sunday, Rusty, who has helped open my eyes to the Truth stated that there is a HUGE difference in Believer's of God and Believer's of Christ. At "CrossRoads Great Banquet #44" I chose Christ. He chose me long before I even understood who I was In Him.

While this is the 44th year of my life, I truly feel like a new creation. I have been reborn. It's so awesome that for the rest of my life I get to spread the good news! I am blessed beyond measure <3 I was in awe this morning when I woke up for everything was covered in a white blanket of snow. Almost like God was saying you have a clean slate Wendy. Here is my view today. Doesn't it just take your breath away?

I am going to try to figure out how to link this Sunday's message about Christ. I am rotten at this kind of thing so if this does not work leave a comment . . . http://www.ustream.tv/channel/sunday-worship-at-pinheads
Rusty really allows the Holy Spirit to communicate through him. He's an awesome servant to Christ.

Today I pray that all who are seeking answers find fellowship with fellow believers in Christ. I pray all who are lost are shown the truth and you "get it". I pray that you take the good news and in turn spread it to others who are lost. I pray we shine so brightly that others are drawn to us. I pray we stay in tune with the Holy Spirit and continue to grow in love. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

Wendy, Mom of Many

Copyright © 2013 Wendy L Glidden. All Rights Reserved.

Who Among Us?

So this morning in conversation, I mentioned to Mike, “God says not to be flamboyant about his protection” . . . then out of my mouth I said, “He promises to protect you through the process of circumstance but he doesn’t control how things play out. We all have Free Will.”

That’s when it dawned on me like a lightning bolt. We are the Hands and Feet of Jesus. We are the ones with the FREE WILL! WE decide how we are going to treat another human being.  How we treat one another can CHANGE everything. In the last couple of elections we as a people have longed for CHANGE. The difference is in how we explain the CHANGE we ALL want.

Here is what I see:

(1) We want more KINDNESS . . . that is what we are really saying with the entitlement programs that have been put in place. Everyone enjoys feeling kind . . . it does something to your heart. We just somehow got to the point with being okay with the government doing it for us. The disconnect from being a part of encouraging someone in this manner is a detriment to our society. The Government is not the body of Christ. It is the law of the land. They can and will never do the job we were meant to do ourselves.

*Sorry ~ the government is the government. They are not Knights in shining armor. They are too busy being childish to even be cable of listening to THEIR own hearts. They certainly are NOT listening to OURS. They have been too busy stirring the flames. Pointing fingers. Placing Blame. Keeping us Angry at our situation as well as at each other. Do you know what it says about Anger in the bible?  

(2) We want people to be Responsible for Themselves when possible:

A)  The Bible is consistent and clear in its message about those who are least able to fend for themselves, Our Orphans, Our widows and our Elderly. We are to lift them up. I am all for that. We suck at this as a society. There must be a more COMPASSIONATE & AFFORDABLE way. I say we reference the Bible on this!

B) On the flip side when it comes to those of us who are capable, We need to shake things up. Tough Love is a necessary thing!  Let’s admit it. We have some serious slackers.  We have coddled our youth to the point of detriment.  Many of them live in an illusion. I often wonder who among them have been taught the matters of the Heart? I KNOW the majority are able to feel pain and fear: hate, jealousy, self-pity, self-doubt . . . in a nut shell All forms of Anger. We have seen too much acting out to deny this Truth.

(3) Our Legal System:  

A) Our punishment system is inhumane.   We live in a fallen world. Our Judicial System is SO FAR OUT OF CONTROL that I often lose my balance in any court room. There is not a whole lot of JUSTICE being served. How have we allowed this to happen? WHERE is OUR compassion?

* We need to encourage one another in ALL of our relationships. Stop the Gossip. Stop the Rumors. Stop the spreading of vicious lies. Start offering a hand and a heart.  Who among us has not caused harm in our lifetime? We all can get better at NOT causing more.

* Who among us has not fallen down on hard times?

* Who among us has not made mistakes? We need to teach our children that this is NOT the end of the world. We need to SHOW them when one falls down they GET BACK UP. THEN they Take a Step Back. NEXT They need to ANALYZE what just went wrong. Then they CHANGE a little or a lot or completely and become a new person!

(4) Our Education System:

A) The Government needs to get out of it. Ask any teacher. Their hands are tied down with as much insane ridiculous restrictions in the name of “God only knows what” that they barely have time to teach.  

As a parent I am OVER it!

B) The tenure protection in a 3 year time frame needs to be taken OFF the table. Seriously, what job does one hold where after 3 years they can’t be fired? (Watch the documentary “Waiting on Superman” before passing judgment on this opinion.) Some teachers are not good teachers. It is the truth. They know it in their hearts. They are in charge of young minds. Their hearts should be in the right place. There is a reason I am not a teacher. It’s a HARD freaking job!

I apologize for my rant if I have offended you. I am surprised at what I have written today. God showed me I would fill many pages of paper with ink. I refuse to allow my fear keep me from publishing something that has flowed so quickly out of my fingers. All my knowledge comes from God. I have had much exposure to a lot and I know God uses all evils for good.

It is my prayer that good things stem from my blogs. I pray anyone who reads my blogs will not find themselves angry at me. I only wish to open others to the heart of the matter. We could be so much better to one another if we got to know Jesus a little better. You want a Utopia? He’s the key to achieving it. I pray you find yourself curious enough to pick up a bible. Go to the New Testament and Read John. I joked last night saying, “John is the gospel for all of us who have been looking for Love in all the wrong places.”  There is a lot of Truth to that statement. I pray you take the time out of your busy life to read the Gospel of John. It’s a “Google” away. I end in thanks to Our Heavenly Father for the wisdom shared in the pages of the Bible. Your Word is Food for the soul. Those of us who are able to read it openly are so blessed. I count myself among them.  Amen.

Wendy, Mom of Many

Copyright © 2013 Wendy L Glidden. All Rights Reserved.