Mike Marketed and Sold My Book!

Mike came home last night with the news that he had sold one of my books to a co-worker. The way he told me was a little comical. I was on a Google hangout with some friends that I network with in a Christian Business Group on Face Book. They all heard him come in and Bill, the one who created the group, asked if he had heard Mike come in.

I smiled and said, “Yes. He just got home.”

Bill called out from my computer for Mike to step in front of the camera so he could see him. Mike and Bill had a couple of good laughs and then Mike headed for the shower. He fabricates during the day and comes home with black grime all over himself. As he headed into the bathroom, he called out over his shoulder that he had sold a book.

I was caught off guard and said out loud, “My book?” which made everyone laugh.

He replied with a smile, “Yes, your book.” And I beamed back at him curious as all get out as to exactly how that had gone down.

Bill quickly filled in his business partner about my blog and my books and then we all realized the time was quickly approaching the end of our meeting. We set our next hangout and said goodbye.

I find it a little comical that I was on the computer with Bill when Mike announced he had sold one of my books. Back when I was about 6 months into blogging, Bill had asked me how Mike felt about me blogging out my life. He was asking because I blog about my life which often includes Mike and me stories. At the time I had told Bill that Mike was good with my blog. At the time Bill inquired, Mike was. In a gist, Mike has felt just about every way a person could feel about something; from amused to irritated to impressed to angry to accepting but not happy about it, to accidentally enjoying them, and now to selling my books.

When I first began blogging, Mike and I were on a mini-separation. On December 1^st, 2011, I had walked out and on December 6^th, I created my blog title and URL and wrote my first two blog posts. I say I created it, but it was really God that led me.

By the time we got back together, I had already attended the Great Banquet and had written over 50 blogs and had over 16,000 page views! Now, I have written over 130 blogs and have had over 54,000 page views. It is crazy to think about it. I have been read in countries I did not even know existed until they showed up in my blogger report.

I have always been intrigued by numbers and there patterns. The bible has numbers in it. When I arrived at my Great Banquet, I discovered I was attending Banquet # 44. Ironically it was also the year I would turn 44 and I just so happened to have written my 44^th blog post the day before I attended. The repeating number did not go unnoticed by me!

The Great Banquet changed my life. By the time I went I had gone through a year study on the book of Luke with Rusty tying Jesus to countless messianic miracles. So, when I went to the Great Banquet, I believed that Jesus was the son of God. I believed in the cross. My stumbling block was tied to my own guilt and lack of belief regarding my worthiness when it came to forgiveness. It is in my own understanding of how blind I still was before the Great Banquet that I am so committed to helping others realize the truth themselves.

If you have followed my blog, you know that I wanted Mike to attend his own Banquet. As it turns out the man he has sold my book to has offered to sponsor Mike. To attend the Great Banquet, you have to be sponsored. Mike has been approached by two people at our church in regards to being sponsored to attend the Great Banquet. Now he is working with a man who listens to Christian music all day long and is asking to sponsor him. This morning I said a prayer for Mike.

He is terrified to go. I believe it is because he knows I went in one person and came out another. Not to say I was a bad person or anything, it is just that I was still a prisoner of sorts. When you are a prisoner, joy alludes you. Fear can keep you frozen. When you are set free, nothing can stop you for you know the truth. You have nothing to fear but fear itself.

Father I come before you today and thank you for bringing fellow brothers and sisters into Mike to continually testify to him. Thank you for continuing to reach out to him and find other ways and people to offer to sponsor him for the Great Banquet. I pray he goes. I pray with your encouragement he conquers his fear and allows himself to draw closer to you than he thinks is possible. May he too long to share the good news. Thank you for marketing the book you called me to write through Mike. That was so cool for me. I also come asking for prayers for strength and perseverance. My week is not over and I am so tired today, I feel as if I have run a marathon and am at the last stretch. I pray for a second wind Father. Thank you. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

PS ~ on my way in to work this morning I had the pleasure of hearing this song. 

Wendy, walks with God,

Mom of Many

© Wendy Glidden 2014

God Is Faithful, Good and True

I have so much to be joyous about.
It makes me laugh and sing and shout!
Life is abundant, I am free
Curious as to how I came to be?

I am not here to brag or boast
It's good news I love to share the most.
God called me out over a year ago
It's in sharing our story others will come to know

God is FAITHFUL, good and true
He sent His son to save me and you!

The Good News is the Best News you will ever hear
If you're not deaf, you'll give a mighty cheer 
If you are blind, you will sadly only sneer
But those that are able to see will be free from fear!

So if today you have found yourself at the end of yourself
I am here to share a story of hope and faith I pray helps
The roads I have traveled have been at times dark and long
But throughout my chapters I reveal how I remained strong

I've been told by others that they have walked a similar street
The most amazing part of my life today would be the others I meet
I am here show you God's mercy, grace and glory
They are intertwined throughout my life story.

I hope through sharing my life with you,
Seeking the Lord becomes something you naturally do
For when you seek, you will discover an abuandance that never ends
P.S. I'm always looking for fellow sisters and brothers for friends 

This is actually a post I began on facebook as a status update on my business page. I had only planned to type an intro and share the encouraging word from K-Love, yet as often happens when I am relaxed, it seems my fingers have something else in mind! Here is today's encouraging word from K-Love:

He has enabled us to be ministers of His new covenant. This is a covenant not of written laws, but of the Spirit. The old written covenant ends in death; but under the new covenant, the Spirit gives life. ~ 2 Corinthians 3:6, NLT

I ask, "Who's longing to LIVE this life and live it abundantly?"

I have seriously been blogging and sharing true life events for over a year now! Before the month ends, I am hoping to publish the first 16 years of my life. Had someone asked me if I thought my first 16 years of life were worthy of publishing, I would have told them no. God thought otherwise.  be blessed and be a blessing 


Wendy Glidden, walks with God
Mom of Many

© Wendy Glidden 2014

'What Can Mortal Man Do to Me?'

Good morning! According to my calendar, it is Totally Terrific Testimonial Tell All Tuesday! Here is one of my testimonies: Last night I was assistant coach for my son's 2nd grade basket ball team. I was able to participate in all the drills and it was awesome!

A year ago everywhere I went, I shuffled. Lifting my feet off the ground was something I simply was not capable of doing. Toward the end of summer, I prayed to God to have my healthy body back. I cried out in anguish. After being in massive pain for almost three years, He had answered my prayer for healing regarding my back and had literally placed a wellness doctor in my path. He was delivered to me in such a way there was no denying it was God that was placing me in his care.

Upon my first visit to him, he began putting my bones back in place. I knew I was in bad shape, I just did not realize how bad! I began seeing him late April / early May and now I only see him once a month for an adjustment.

With his help, I had the confidence to begin a workout routine that another friend suggested I try. She had been pursuing me to try one of her companies workout videos and I had told her about the fact I truly needed a 'Physical Therapy' kind of work out video to follow and she knew just what I needed. She excitedly told me about it and I decided to give it a go.

I am so happy I did. In 42 days, which is only six weeks time, I have dropped 36 pounds and 34" of body fat from my skeletal frame and have gained amazing agility and flexibility in the process. I am so happy with how far I have come I could cry tears of absolute joy. I am now one of 'those girls' with a fat loss story that is unbelievable! I have not made it to my goal size or weight but I now know it is 100% possible in the next 42 days to get the job finished!

My goal is to lose 78 pounds. This will also mean losing 4-5 more inches around my waist, 2 - 3 more at my hips and another 1 - 2 off my chest area. With that my arms and legs will also shrink a bit.

I read once that for every pound you take off of your body it is like removing 4 pounds of burden. I know my frame appreciates the lighter weight it must still tote around. I can only dream about how awesome getting back to where I want to be will feel! Only 42 more pounds to shed!

I have promised to reach back and help anyone who is desiring to truly lose weight. It is hard work. It takes determination. However, this works so well and is so healthy, you will secretly enjoy watching yourself melt. If you need a coach or someone to encourage you or whatever label you want to slap on it, I would be thrilled to be that for you. Simply email me at wendyglidden123@gmail.com and indicate what you want help with.

I'm into total wellness so from helping you with your mindset and your relationship with the Lord to losing weight and getting into the size pants you want back into or into for the first time, I am here for you! Nothing would please me more than to reach back and help someone who has tried almost everything and failed.

Recently God has been flashing me things from my past again. As far as my life line goes I managed to get beyond the adoption to the point I almost lost my life in a bike wreck due to literally working myself to death so that I could fall asleep without thinking. Absolute off the charts craziness is what follows that scene and I have once again been dragging my feet.

However, this past Sunday, when we were asked what becoming a believer in the cross and Jesus Christ had changed in our life, I replied, for me it had meant freedom of fear. Fear of judgement from others, fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of anything.

It reminds me of David when he asks, 'What can mortal man do to me?' I love David's Psalms. We are covering 4 different Psalms in November. Last Sunday we covered Psalm 32 and touched on Psalm 56, which is one of my endless favorites. I am going to share David's words here, right out of my MacArthur study bible. I hope you love his trust and enthusiasm half as much as I do! Psalm 56 in it's entirety:

** My study bible highlights this as Supplication for Deliverance and Grateful Trust in God. This took place when the Philistines seized David in Gath.

verse 1: Be gracious to me, O God, for man has trampled upon me; Fighting all day long he oppresses me.

verse 2: My foes have trampled upon me all day long, For they are many who fight proudly against me.

verse 3: When I am afraid, I will put my trust in You.

verse 4: In God, whose word I praise, In God I have put my trust; I shall not be afraid. What can mere man do to me?

verse 5: All day long they distort my words; All their thoughts are against me for evil.

verse 6: They attack, they lurk, They watch my steps, As they have waited to take my life.

verse 7: Because of wickedness, cast them forth, In anger put down the peoples, O God!

verse 8: You have taken account of my wanderings; Put my tears in Your bottle. Are they not in Your book?

verse 9: Then my enemies will turn back in the day when I call; This I know, that God is for me.

verse 10: In God whose word I praise, In the Lord, whose word I praise,

verse 11: In God I have put my trust, I shall not be afraid. What can man do to me?

verse 12: Your vows are binding upon me, O God; I will render thank offerings to You.

verse 13: For You have delivered my soul from death, Indeed my feet from stumbling, So that I may walk before God in the light of the living.

I love the trust King David places in the Lord. I know just how he feels. As I go forth and share more things from my early to mid twenties, I too will trust in the Lord knowing that He is using my stories to inspire and encourage and call others home. All for the glory of God.

I thank the Lord for all He has delivered me from. While I have shared a ton, I have so much more to reveal. I keep saying I am going to get to it and truly I am. I must go back and refresh my memory of where I ended exactly so that I can continue from there.

Should you just be joining me in this journey, I invite you to go back to my introduction post, in my mind humorously titled, 'In the Beginning' and read the personal posts up to 'Saying Goodbye to Amanda Rose' there is one after that where I share my bike wreck, but for the life of me I cannot remember it's title right now.

It is my prayer that my story inspires hope and reveals the glory of God. It is also my prayer that it helps you in building your trust and your relationship with the Lord.

I have missed out on sharing the last couple days encouraging words by K-Love on my Facebook page and I love both Monday's and Today's, so I am going to share both of them now:

Monday 11/4/2013

But the Lord stood with me and gave me strength ~ 2 Timothy 4:17a, NLT

Tuesday 11/5/2013

I promise this very day that I will repay two blessings for each of your troubles. ~ Zechariah 9:12b, NLT 

The Lord has stood with me time and time again and has given me strength. I know this as truth for I have felt myself drained of all strength, yet remain planted on my feet, held up firmly by the mighty hand of our Lord. 

I too am beginning to witness what I would say are more than two blessings for each of my troubles. Perhaps it feels like more for I have had much trouble over my life span! Us saints are not promised an easy life you know!! I hope I have managed to leave you with a smile today! Remember be blessed and be a blessing to others!

Father, today I come to you singing praises for all the miracles you have performed concerning me. I am blessed to call upon you and have you deliver me. I am blessed to have the relationship that I do with you. For decades I called upon you in times of big trouble but turned my back on you in my daily life. What a fool I was to think you were not for me any longer. What a fool to believe the lies that were being fed to me by the evil one. He is clever but not wise for he set himself against you to begin with. Thank you for speaking to me. Thank you for your signs and wonders. I pray I am witness to many more for they tickle me to no end. Father, it is my prayer that more of my brothers and sisters that are today where I have been in my past concerning a relationship with you step fully into the light and draw much closer to you. May their eyes and hearts be opened my Lord. May they begin to seek more of your wisdom and love and may they grow and become workers. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

Wendy, walks with God
Mom of Many

© Wendy Glidden 2013

What is Your Purpose?

Wild Wacky Wonderful Wednesday What Whimsical Wonders Will you remind me of today? I could hardly believe it when I looked out my window and saw snow on the ground and the car! Seeing how it's not even November yet I would certainly count that as both wacky and wild however wonderful and snow don't go together in my book anymore. My children on the other hand were super excited about it all. Just goes to show you it is indeed the way you view things that affects your attitude toward outside circumstances!

Yesterday I went in for my monthly adjustment at Dr. Woods in Westfield. He is the chiropractor that God put in my path. I know this for sure for when I found him in all reality it was his office that had found me. It was around May of this year and while my back has been in major pain since my fall it was at this time that my feet were beginning to swell and swell bigger than they ever had. I knew it was pressure on my spine and I knew things were getting bad by the size of my feet but we were so busy at the office there was simply no way I was going to have any time to look for a chiropractor I could afford. I went to bed both crying and praying for my pain ridden body. That week we received a call from Dr. Woods office offering a free assessment and adjustment in exchange for a can of food. Amazingly enough Dr. Woods is right in Westfield by the Kroger on SR 32 & Carey Road. A mere ten minute drive from my office! I set up an appointment with him that evening after work right before bible study and silently prayed that he would have the hands to help me. Up to that point I had been to several doctors and even massage therapy and at one point I saw a chiropractor for six months but never got better so I stopped going. So the two girls I drive to bible study with met me at Dr. Woods office as we were pushing time with my appointment. When Jean, one of the girls arrived she began telling me she wished I could see her Chiropractor for he was amazing. Right then Doctor Woods walked down the hallway. As it turns out, he was Jeans chiropractor. She was right, he has a gift. Without any equipment, he showed me what was going on with my spine and in an instant I knew I had found my doctor. You could see that the way I had fallen in November 3 years ago was exactly what had caused all this twisting and hip displacement. He put together a plan for getting me back in place and gave me my first adjustment. I was a mess. Jean said she could not believe how much I moved as he adjusted me on the table. Now a few months later with his help I was able to begin lifting my feet up off the floor and slowly my pain level decreased and my agility improved. I knew the only way it was going to get even better was for me to begin some type of physical therapy. I needed to drop some weight, lengthen my muscles again and get my body back. I am amazed as I look in the review mirror and fully see the pieces that God put into place for me. The people that he added to my life and I love how He works. Sure He could have healed me in a moment but this way has been a much more fulfilling process. I have met countless believers in Christ along my walk and my life has been enriched in so many ways.

Those of you who read my posts last week already know I had lost some serious inches and you also know that I do not step on a scale every day or even every week. I believe the scale can kill your momentum. But I do check my weight at the doctors office. So the last time I had stepped on the scale was in August and I tipped the scale at 241 pounds. Yes. It is true. Last night when I stepped on the scale I was hoping for a maximum of 220. I about fell over when the scale balanced itself at 211 pounds. I almost cried. I have not been this light which is still 50 pounds above my goal weight in six years! SIX YEARS!!! I know now that I can make it to my goal weight. I have the formula for success and I have a great team supporting me. I don't even care that the world knows how fat I was, it's not like you couldn't see I was extremely overweight by looking at my picture. If anyone seriously wants to know how I have shrunk or any element of my wellness journey, I would be thrilled to tell you what ever it is you want to know. Write me an email. Friend me on Facebook or like my Facebook fan page and send me a message. Here is the link to my fan page if you are on Facebook! https://www.facebook.com/YouAreWorthyToo I'm almost to 500 likes in my first year! Just know I am here if you need a friend or a partner to support and encourage you along the way. And that counts for not just health and weight loss, but mindset and faith and hope as well. Just saying. My purpose is to give others hope.

I too need hope and encouragement. We all do. I turn to God now for my daily inspiration. I get my first dose via Moody Radio and then a follow up with an encouraging word from K-Love in my email. I keep my study bible on me at all times and look up things often. Here is today's encouraging word form K-Love:

Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing. ~ John 15:5, NLT

I love that. I mean it really does not get any more simple than that. Apart from Jesus we are not going to produce fruit. I don't care what else you manage to get done in this life, if you are not producing fruit you simply are not living an abundant life. There is a big difference in being successful in this world and producing fruit in this world. Not that the two can't go hand in hand, but sadly we often see successful people and they are producing no fruit. To me they are not truly successful for I know in my heart when they close the door and are alone, they are empty and void and most likely know they are missing something. Sadly because we have shoved God and Jesus to the back of the room and honestly right out of the entire picture, people aren't even aware that this is what they are missing. Their disconnect from their creator is the cause of their depression, worry, anxiety, fears and everything else that is not good. They are in need of prayers for sure. 

Father I come to you with joy in my heart. You are such an amazing creator. I love your ways. I love all you have done for me. I love how even when I have strayed you have remained faithful. I shake my head with absolute wonder as I look in the review mirror and see how you have always been there. I love how you are stretching and growing me in ways I didn't even know I needed. You are so wise in the way you work. I love everything about my life today. I love the relationship I have with you. Amazing how that changes everything. Just knowing that I am yours. I am forever thankful. Today I ask that you help those who are blind or lost or fumbling in the dark in search for what may cure their problems, their aching hearts, their fears. Lift them Father. Help them feel your presence. I pray they open their hearts and eyes and minds to you, your wisdom and your love Father. May more of us begin to wake up and get to work! In Jesus name I pray. Amen

Wendy, walks with God,

Mom of Many

© Wendy Glidden

Do You Feel Like You Are Missing Something in Life?

Wild Wacky Wonderful Wednesday What Whimsical Wonders Will you bring my way today?! I awoke this morning to an extra child in my bed. Delightful Delilah is under the weather. Currently her and Jeffrey are laying down in the other room watching a movie. Somehow last night I managed to help everyone with their homework, reading and book reports. Yes. Book reports in the second grade. I don't know who school is more stressful on the children or me! It is tough to squeeze in quality time in three hours after work when you have to help with homework, have 3 children read books to you, serve dinner, clean up, make sure everyone takes a shower and put them all to bed after a 9 hour work day with a 3 year old assistant for the entire day and 4 additional helpers for the last hour and a half! I have also implemented a workout routine into my day that I do at night after all of that! It's crazy, it's hectic but I am finally getting into the full swing of it. Or at least I think I am. This morning I discovered one child's homework was not successfully packed away into her folder and it is now sitting on my desk. It will be late. I have no help today so taking it up to school to save the day like a super hero mom is just not going to happen. Life. It is what it is. Thank God I know I am not perfect or something as small as that might put me right over the edge!

Last night I went to my monthly meeting with mom's who are seeking God's heart, so dinner was already prepared for us. I have been getting more and more back into the mentality of a more organized mom. I have turned Sunday into my prepare for the week ahead day. I make sure we have enough folded socks in each drawer. I reorganize drawers and closets as well as shoe and coat bins. The most awesome thing I do to make the week easier is I prep the meals we are going to have for the week. I purchased a little mini oven and have it in my back office. Now at 4:30 pm I take out the meal we decide on that I prepared on Sunday and I throw it in my oven. At Five when I get off work, dinner is done! This simple little change in the way I do things gained me an hour of meal time each day of the week. There are countless things on the Internet to help with this. I just simplified it for myself. I brown all the hamburger I will need for my five meals or cook some chicken, then I divide it all up into the daily portions and prepare the individual meals. I let them cool off and then I pack them up and in the freezer they go. Each day I grab what meal the kids vote on and that is what we have for dinner that night. It truly has made a difference in how smoothly things run through the week. If you too are a single mom in the midst of craziness, I encourage you to try this for just one week and see if you find it helpful at all. If you aren't into this style, I would highly suggest working in a crock pot meal or two each week. I did that when I was younger and only had two children and two full time jobs! Like I said, there are countless moms out there that have taken the time to put up websites full of tips just like this but in much much much greater detail. A friend of mine just sent me a link to a great site the other day. Here is the link:  http://lifeasmom.com/2013/10/freezer-cooking-will-save-you-time.html

As I do each weekday morning, I check out what K-Loves encouraging word of the day is. Here is what I found:

Jesus replied, "I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry again. Whoever believes in me will never be thirsty  ~ John 6:35, NLT

I am blessed to understand the truth in this. For me, before I came to know Jesus as my Savior, I would have days when I knew I was missing something but I just couldn't put my finger on it. Those are the days I would go shopping looking for that certain something that would somehow simplify my life or bring me a little joy. Sometimes those are the days I would go out to eat because I was looking for something better than what I had in the refrigerator. I think that emptiness we feel is the call to come back home. We just don't have anyone pointing in the right direction. Somehow in our society we have come very far from even mentioning God. Even more so openly talking about Jesus. It's almost still okay to openly discuss your thoughts on God but you have to be schooled on how to approach the whole Jesus subject for fear of how you may be taken. To label yourself as a Christian can get you killed in some places in the world. The united States is not too far from getting a little on the crazy side with the whole same sex issues. When you listen to what the Supreme Court said as far as the opinion one might hold regarding same sex marriage, well, it just sends chills down your spine. His basically said if you have a problem with same sex marriage, you are an enemy of the human race. An enemy of the race! That is a bit scary. I mean let's really get down to this whole issue of what is labeled as sin in the bible and take it to it's most extreme basic idea. We are even warned to not get angry. Allow me to share with you Matthew Chapter 5, verses 21-22:

verse 21: "You have heard that the ancients were told, 'YOU SHALL NOT COMMIT MURDER' and 'Whoever commits murder shall be liable to the court.'

verse 22: But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother shall be guilty before the court; and whoever says to his brother, 'You good-for-nothing,' shall be guilty before the supreme court; and whoever says, 'You fool,' shall be guilty enough to go into the fiery hell.

So, if I warn others that getting angry is a gateway to hell, pardon the pun, am I too an enemy of the human race? I beg everyone, please let us not use the word of God and twist it into a court battle. It is the word of God for crying out loud. How can mere men pass judgement upon it? Why on earth would they believe they are so grandiose? It truly baffles me. I believe that mindset is the work of the evil one, Satan, the father of Lies. By following Christ and walking the narrow path we are in a way helping ourselves stay out of the clutches of the evil one. Think of the bible as a safety manual set up to help you walk through this life with as little theft as possible. Remember the evil one's purpose is to steal, kill and destroy. God wants you to live life and live it abundantly. Jesus came to complete the law and He did just that. This is the message of Grace. God, His Son, His word, it is not something for us to debate over. It is just what it is. It is meant to encourage us not to tear us apart. The evil one is the one that gets in your ear and bends it saying you can not believe in this Most High God for you are '_____' whatever he has labeled you. You must remember he is the father of lies. Protect yourself daily with the proper attire. Trust me what ever really is sin will begin to not feel right to you. You will be convicted by the voice of righteousness that reminds you that you are a holy redeemed saint, you are a child of God and you just simply will begin to know and recognize when you are walking in the flesh. You will begin to mature spiritually. It will happen. However if you put up walls and say that is not for me because I prefer this, well, in the flesh you will continue to walk until you take those walls down. It is a choice. You can talk Gospel and truth to a non believer until you are blue in the face and as it says in the bible, they are blind and deaf to it. It just does not penetrate. All you can do is pray for that person. That way when and if they should seek, others have already intervened on their behalf and it is my belief that they can instantly be 'blinded by the light' so to say. People really can and do change. When they become believers and followers of Christ, they simply become a new creation. You will witness their fruit. It becomes undeniable that they indeed are different. 

Like I said, it is wild Wednesday and I never know what the day will bring. We never do. One of my favorite things (laughing because there are too many favorites to count) is when God suggests that today has enough trouble of it's own so don't fret about tomorrow. Stay in the moment. Great advice. Today I encourage you to stay in the moment. Enjoy life. Seek God. Read a bit out of his word. Get hungry for it. It truly will pump you up and fuel your days and sustain you through the rough times. 

Father, today I pray more and more of us realize what that emptiness inside of them is. A call to come home. I pray that we begin to shake off this slumber and wake up fully. May we crave your word Father and thirst for your direction. Oh Father what a glorious Life we would all live were we to invite you into our lives. I know all you have done for me even when I had walls up Father and you amaze me. I understand the footprints picture even more today. Thank you for carrying me so many times. I am thankful that I have sought you for you are Faithful. It is true. All your promises are true. May countless brothers and sisters seek you Father. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

Wendy, walks with God,

Mom of Many

© Wendy Glidden 2013

So, Let Me Ask You, Do You Have Hope?

Fantastically Fun-Filled Fabulous Friday! As I read K-Loves Encouraging word this morning, I just am overwhelmed with emotion. You could say I've walked a bumpy road, you could even truthfully say I went in the complete wrong direction a time or two, bound and determined to have my way. We all have a past. We all have something we are not proud of. But do not let that hold you prisoner. For that is not what your Father has suggested you should do. Here is today's encouraging word from K-Love:

Come back to the place of safety,all you prisoners who still have hope! I promise this very day that I will repay two blessings for each of your troubles.

~ Zechariah, Chapter 9, verse 12, NLT

What a call to return home! A promise to bless you twice for each trouble. Not just come home, I'll show you some love. No. I will REPAY TWO BLESSINGS for EACH TROUBLE.

So, let me ask you, do you have hope? If you do, I urge you to invest that hope in your relationship with God. The closer you get to Him, the more you will witness a difference in the ways things unfold in your life. Prayer matters. It part of your armor. I don't know about your daily life but throughout my day I run into others that seem to be having a really bad day. If you are not prepared to come under attack, these run ins will really throw you into a loop. I talk a lot about renewing one's mind. So many of us are watching these so called 'reality shows' with MAJOR drama in the mix. You can believe all you want that these shows do not impact the way you yourself react to certain things, but if this is all you are pumping into your mind, I can promise you this is a natural result.

On the other hand, if you are delving into God's word, if you are renewing your mind in as many positive ways as humanely possible, I can also promise you that situations will not escalate in the same manner. If you add prayer to that formula you will often witness unbelievable events. Like a child lifting a car off a parent or vice versa as an example. Or like me, you may be blessed by becoming a tool in the healing of another individual! Perhaps you might meet another sister in Christ who has a message for you, given to her by your Heavenly Father! This could lead to so much more. I know this to be true beyond a shadow of a doubt. Of course if you have read my blog "Show Me A Sign" as well as "Unpacking Treasure, show me a sign part II" you know this actually took place in my life as well. By being introduced to my sister in Christ, I ended up meeting her sister at a fundraiser and today I am a part of her ministry. I am telling you, your whole world could explode in blessings!

I have to laugh, because last night at bible study we were talking about how we are instructed to rejoice always. Not just in the good times but through the mishaps of life as well. We happened to be reading about Paul and Silas in Acts, Chapter 16. They had just been dragged into town by the slave owners of a fortune telling girl who, due to Paul ordering the demon to come out of her in the name of Jesus, had lost her talent and in turn the slave owners risked losing their profits. The slave owners made the false claim that Paul and Silas were throwing their city into confusion, being Jews, and claimed they were proclaiming customs which were not lawful for Romans to accept or observe! The crowd rose against Paul and Silas and the chief magistrates tore Silas and Paul's robes off and ordered them to be beaten with rods. After striking them with many blows they hauled them off to prison. The jailer threw them into the inner prison and fastened their feet in stocks. This is the first recorded account of anti-semitism! So next, we learn that Paul and Silas were not only praying, they were also singing hymns of praise to God. It also says all the prisoners were listening to them when suddenly there was an earthquake so grand that the foundations of the prison house were shaken and All the doors were opened and everyone's chains were unfastened! I cannot imagine what that scene must have looked like! One thing is for sure that is some exciting stuff!!! 

 this past Thursday I had posted this on my 'You Are Worthy Too' fan page: Tremendously thankful thoughtful Thursday! Indeed I am thankful. Yesterday my 'world' could have blown up. I admit I cried out loud. I called a friend quickly and asked if she would pray for all of us as I was a mess. She did. In the end what was meant for evil became good. Thank you Father God. As your word claims, it is true:

As soon as I pray, you answer me; you encourage me by giving me strength.
~ Psalm 138:3, NLT

In the midst of absolute fear of what may transpire, I was able to keep my head about me and leaned upon my heavenly Father. He not only gave me strength, He provided me with insight. 

****** I started this blog post on Friday. It is now Sunday. In the last 5 days I have dealt with massive fear 3 times. I cannot imagine what shape I would be in right now were it not for my relationship with the Lord. I'm about to purchase some knee pads, for I have fallen on my knees several times in a few short hours. At the end of the day, my children are safe, my mother is safe, Mike is safe. Thank you Father God for your protection and your love. I feel like I have survived a train wreck. Amazingly enough I was even able to chuckle at a couple of mistaken words on a face book posts. The whole message changes when pray becomes pay and letters becomes lawyers. Laughter truly is a medicine. 

Father God I ask that you help those in pain find a way to laugh through their tears as you have caused me to do tonight. You truly are a loving Father. Where would I be without you? I shudder to even think what life would be like were you not there for me to lean on. The evil one is banging at my door Father. He is trying to steal, kill and destroy. I ask that you bind him. In Jesus name I pray. Amen

Wendy

© Wendy Glidden, 2013

I'm Just a Girl

Through out my lifetime friends have paid me compliments such as, "You are strong" or "I really admire your strength."   I laugh and tell them, "I'm not strong. I'm just a girl. I have had my fair share of  "in shambles" moments just like everyone else. I just know that my life has changed majorly several times in the snap of a finger. . . who's to say next time won't be awesome? I realize that quality I possess is 'Hope'. How blessed I am to have that within me.

More recently I have begun getting compliments about how brave I am. I am not brave at all. I just discovered the truth. It is so freeing. It is such good news it will cause you to weep with joy when you completely get it. It is so simple. It is the Lord of Air that tricks us into believing it is complex! He will come at you Every Day, in Every Way. His purpose is to steal, kill and destroy.  Remember if it is not of Love, then it is not of God. Recognize the Emotion and Call it for what it is. You Have Within you all you need to win this spiritual battle. You have been given all the outside tools that will best help you remain victorious day after day.

Today is Totally Terrific Testimonial Tell All Tuesday! Yippee! Today my tell all is this:

Happiness Comes. It Also Goes
It's Joy that FILLS you from Head to Toes.
If you want laughter through the mess
Renew your mind it will reduce the stress.

Today I offered a couple of dares / challenges on Facebook. This covers the Renew Your Mind Challenge. Leave me a comment if you are curious to also take the 35 point Dare Challenge . . . it's more about health & fitness. This one is for your mind. Trust me when I say all aspects of Wellness touch on each other. Work on one area and you will begin a flywheel like none other!

I am offering a 30 day Renew Your Mind Challenge.  

For one month I challenge you to turn off the TV. Listen to Moody radio at home and in the car and even at work if you are able. If a program comes on that you feel is not for you, change over to K-Love or another Christian station. I guarantee you will experience a mind change. The more you listen to Moody the better. I cannot begin to count how much I have learned from their various programs. How much I continue to learn. We are blessed to have the privilege to listen to such teachings.

I also challenge you to listen to the teaching on Hebrews that I am listening to. I have not figured out how to add things outside of YouTube to my blog. . . deep sigh . . . one day perhaps I will gain that insight. For now copy and paste this and it will take you there: http://www.ustream.tv/channel/sunday-worship-at-pinheads. From this link you will have awesome access to learning who you are in Christ and how this knowledge will totally change your life.

My final Challenge is to pick up your Bible and Read the Word of God for yourself. If that seems overwhelming at the moment, find a daily devotional you can read daily. Tons of them are available on line.

Anyone wanting to start this challenge, feel free to email me at WendyGlidden123@gmail.com with an I'm taking the 30 Day Renew Your Mind Challenge! You don't have to. It's just there for those of you who want to.

I leave you with one final thought: I am not brave, I simply fear no evil. My God is Bigger. There are a million songs I could post that I sing daily. Today I am sharing this one: Whom Shall I Fear?

Today I pray for all who have lost hope. Father, please meet them right where they are. I also come before you today asking you to watch over and protect all who are out sharing the good news. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

Wendy, Mom of Many

© Wendy Glidden 2012-2013

My Title to This Blog Stands

Fabulous!!! It is Fantastically Fun-Filled Family Friday!! Can I get a whoop whoop!

 Last week at this time I was attacked by a fellow believer in Jesus. I began a blog last December not of my own will but of God's. If you have read my blog, you would realize most would not willingly tell so much about their life. Honestly, if I hadn't lived the life I have lived, I'm not sure I would be blogging out all my skeletons. Regardless, when you pray for a sign and have a billboard land in your path, well, you stand back and recognize. This was the case for me. I was informed by this person that my blog title was offensive. (I Am Worthy) it bothered me so much I asked for others opinions in every group I am in. The feedback was this. "We love the title. We know Jesus is the reason we can go to the throne with boldness. No explanation needed." My all-time favorite reply came from Nakilah Shannon, she runs the ministry group called Hagar’s Fountain of Hope, here is the link to her ministry page on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HagarsFoH?ref=ts&fref=ts . 

She said in a gist, “Wendy, if God had a problem with your blog, HE would have convicted you. I know you have no problem hearing Him." So, with that in mind, my title is going back to the original "I AM WORTHY" without the tag line that I had added due to my Fear of being mis-understood. After all, Nakilah is right, God put that title in my head for a purpose. Who am I to deny Him that? If you have never read even one of my blogs, what are you waiting for?

This last week has been so crazy. I have been up until midnight every night this week and somehow I still have so much work left undone.  I have not written one blog this week. My study bible has vanished and I have allowed that to drive me insane. I did recognize the silver lining this morning on my way to work. My car is clean, my home is Organized. In my search I cleaned and straightened every corner of my home.  I have resolved to go to the Christian store and purchase another one. I am sure once I do this the original will suddenly appear like a snake ready to strike!

** Update regarding my study bible! It has been found. It would seem someone, while cleaning the car, found my bible too big to belong inside the car! It was placed in the trunk in a box to keep it safe of all places. Shaking my head. Husbands! It would be nice if you remembered what you did when you "cleaned up"! I am so happy to have it back. A regular bible just is not the same!! Plus this one is a lap bible so I can curl up and read. I am amazed at how I see the story unfolding in my head. I can almost hear Paul at times. How incredible it must have been to actually see this man talking about the Glory of God. He must have lit up as bright as the North star!!

I recently figured out how to add you tube videos to my blog. Soon I will know how to make my own! How far I have come!! Anyway, the first time I heard this song it left me in tears. It hit so close to home. I hope you take a moment to listen. It ties in perfectly with this particular blog. I know this is why God gave me this title. The evil one told me I was unworthy for years. You know that if you read my story from the beginning. Enjoy! This won the K-Love song of the year award!

I would like to encourage anyone who has landed on this particular blog to flip your view so that you can see all of the titles of my previous blogs. Over half of these blogs are true life accounts. As I mentioned, God called me to openly share my travels with the world. Some of my blogs are about hot topics like gun control, welfare, bullying just to name a few. A couple posts are just poems or about something I did with my family recently. I suggest you pick a couple titles that catch your interest. If you enjoy them and would like to know my full story, I suggest you start back at the first blog. Ironically titled “In the Beginning” Our Father!! He has an awesome sense of humor. I hope you catch that through my story! Stay blessed. Stay Focused in the Word. We are in a battle my friends! Gather your gear and join me in this fight!!

Today I pray for all who are taunted by the evil one. I pray we recognize Satan’s voice and mute it every time he, The Lord of Air, begins to whisper false truths. I pray for those who remain in doubt regarding Satan and Jesus. May their eyes be opened to the truth, I pray they are struck with curiosity so much so that they begin to read Your Word Father. I pray it speaks volumes to them. I pray for those who spread the good news Father may they do so boldly bringing only Glory to your name. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

Wendy, Mom of Many

© Wendy Glidden 2012-2013

A Shotgun Wedding

This chapter is a continuation from "My Scarlet Letter".

That summer I developed a crush on a guy named Jim and another guy named Jeff was interested in me. I have never verified this but I was told by a mutual friend that he was paid $50 to do and say what he did and said to both Jim and me.

I worked drive thru mostly. I was a runner and cashier. It did not matter who I was teamed up with, all of my teams had the best times. Yes, I think this counts as gloating! Anyway, my favorite team was Jimmy and I. There was electricity that flowed between him and I that was undeniable.

I imagine that is why Jeff devised the plan he did. Jeff had this dream of being in a rock and roll band and I always wanted to be a writer. Anyone who knew me for any length of time knew that about me. I was always writing. Poetry. Short stories. It didn't matter really. At home both Chris and Dad had made comments about how I was only going to amount to a girl who sat in a corner and wrote. I would do creative writing assignments for fellow classmates just for the challenge it provided me. Sick isn't it? Who desires more homework? Me! That's who. Anyway, I had offered to write some songs for him and his band. I guess Jeff liked me and wanted to take out the competition because according to our mutual friend Rick he had lied to me about Jim after being paid $50 by Jeff to do his evil deed. (This I found out later in life when Rick and I reconnected for a moment a few years down the road)

So the story goes. Jim had kissed me in the cooler the night before. It was amazing. The next day I was informed by Rick that Jim felt like I was throwing myself at him and he really wasn't interested in me. I was told he wished I'd stop flirting with him because he had a girlfriend in Noblesville. I was devastated. I decided to put up a wall of ice towards Jim that he never saw coming. When he went to Rick (our mutual friend) to inquire if he knew what was going on with me, Rick told him that I was not interested in him and felt pressured and wished he'd stop flirting with me. I was already in my "no attention" zone so Jim took his words as truth just as I had.

With Jimmy firmly out of the way, Jeff invited me over to his place to work on some of the lyrics "with the band" that I still had not met. When I arrived there it was just Jeff. He was 4 years older than me and quite seductive I must admit. While not yet resolved to sleeping with him, I began hanging out with Jeff more and more. I never did meet the rest of his band . . .

The summer was closing in on the start of school and I had discovered that my step-mother had gone to visit her sister in Kansas and would be gone for two weeks. She had always gotten in the way of my having a decent relationship with my father. All the way back to my early childhood . . . somewhere between 6 & 8 while visiting on a summer day, I suggested that an ice cream cone sure would help cool things off. Chris informed my father that I was attempting to "wrap him around my little finger and trick him into doing things for me and I must be stopped." This was done within earshot. All my life Chris mandated how close my relationship was with my father. With her gone I thought this would be my last chance to spend some honest quality time with my father without interference. I discussed this with my mom as I decided going back a week prior to school was what I wanted to do. The same day I went back Chris came back too. She had had a falling out with her sister.

Another school in Zionsville offered this "bring a friend to school day" on their first day. A friend of mine (Shelly) went to school there and she had invited me to go to with her for the first day in school. This was my junior year and the gist was back then when you were in your senior year you could decide where you wanted to go to school if you paid to go outside your zone. I was such a radical kid back then . . . I didn't smoke, I didn't do drugs, I didn't drink. I wasn't even participating in any sexual relationship . . . yet. I wanted to spend my day off work at a school! Whew! What a wild child I was.

When I approached my father with what I intended to do he told me no. Being more open mouthed after a summer with my mother, I questioned his decision. He told me I couldn't go because he did not know this friend. I suggested that while he may "know my friends" he didn't really know them and maybe he could just have a little faith in me. Things got a little hot and he asked me, "Why did you even bother to come back?" I looked at him and said, "To be honest I was told Chris was in Kansas and I was hoping to have some time with you without her." He called me a liar. I said, "You don't F*****g believe me, I'll call mom and you can ask her!" and I stomped to the phone. I grabbed it and marched to the table as he said, "What did you just say to me?" Being allowed to cuss openly over the summer had just got my rear in hot water. I knew what I'd said but I stated the following, "If you don't believe me, I'll call mom and you can ask her." It was too late. What happened next was far from pretty. He pushed me into a chair so hard I went head over heals right out of it. Before I had my bearings he was yanking me back onto my feet. I stared intently at the floor. He demanded that I look at him and being me I had to push it. "I refuse to look a maniac in the eyes." I replied. Again . . . not the wisest thing to say. Things went from bad to worse and as he tried pulling me down stairs out of view and earshot of my younger sister, Cady. Chris gave Tommy, my brother, instructions to bar Cady in her room and she walked around the corner as calmly as one could and said, "Okay that's enough, let's go downstairs and discuss this." No sooner than we got down the steps here came Cady. She was very upset and she demanded to know why my father was beating me up. He assured her he had not been beating me up . . . he explained that we were only dancing the way that the French people do. My baby sister is and was no fool. She is now in the profession of helping families with issues.

From that moment I welcomed my destiny and I went to Jeff and gave myself to him. As a matter of fact, I sought out Jeff every morning before school. I was confused after two months of this that I had not conceived my first child. I began thinking perhaps my destiny had been cancelled due to my outright spiting God and being angry with him over the last couple of years. I decided perhaps my life was my life after all and I needed a change. While discussing this with Jeff he informed me that he had  connections with someone who could give me a whole new identity. It would cost me $1000 but with that I could buy all I needed to become someone else. I began budgeting and saving more and figured I'd have that saved up before the end of November. We planned for me to make my final escape come Jan 6th. 1986.

You know what they say about the best laid plans . . .

Prior to Thanksgiving I came down with my annual tonsillitis. This time things had gotten really dangerous. Chris believed if my body was forced to fight off the illness without medicine it would become stronger. Unfortunately, I ended up running a dangerously high fever on the third day of being shut in my room. Chris had come down to check on me, as the story is told by Donna's father who she ran into at Westfield Pharmacy picking up my prescription. He told me she'd said, "Wendy was out of it so I slid the thermometer into her mouth." According to the story I sat up and spit the thermometer out and began yelling, "Turn the Page".' I had fallen out reading 'That was Then, This is Now' by S.E. Hinton. My fever in seconds had registered 105 and Chris who weighed maybe 115lbs at the time dragged me up a flight of stairs, got me in the car and drove an hour to her doctor in Tipton with the windows down. When we got there her doctor was off and I was seen by an alternate. I have never heard a doctor tear into an adult the way he tore into Chris. He threatened not only her but to also have her doctor pulled in front of the medical board if my tonsils were not removed. I got a shot of penicillin in my butt and my surgery was scheduled to take place right before Thanksgiving.

This slowed down my ability to stash money a little but it had not stopped me. I had the money required and was now working on funds to carry me until I found a job under my new identity.

Much to my dismay, my father and I ended up in another spat. This time in the car and over my clarinet. When he went to backhand me, I managed to get out of the way. My poor sister, who was in the middle, ended up getting my punishment for my smart mouth. I was horrified. That night I resolved to leave sooner than planned. I confided this in a notebook that Donna and I passed back and forth between classes. Somehow my plans to leave were shared with the new school counselor and she called me out of class into her office. I managed to convince her that I had no plans to leave. I explained to her that this journal was simply my way of venting. I told her I was under an immense amount of stress and had developed a bleeding ulcer. I begged her not to call my parents that day but to allow me to come back to school in the 5th period the next day with my real mother and with her there I would be open to a "family" meeting. I told her if she called today my parents would keep me from this doctor appointment to have me and my bleeding ulcer looked at. Lies. Complete lies. If Chris had gotten her hands on my journal, I'd have been hosed. That was the real truth. I told Donna I was leaving in the morning and she, for some odd reason, decided she wanted to go with me. I told her I'd be going over to the apartments Jeff had lived at and trying to catch a ride to catch another ride to French Lick. I was going to find Jeff and move ahead with my plan of purchasing a new identity. This was December 9th . . . almost a month ahead of schedule but I had more than enough money stashed to jump.

That night I took down my poems and journal that now spanned 3 of the 4 walls in my room from ceiling to 3' above the floor. I left one sign I'd made that stated, "Let he who has not sinned cast the first stone" as well as a poem that started out "Children and Parents, A match made in hell. When I escape, Things will be well." During the current school year, Chris had ransacked my room often so I put my diary on the wall. I knew she never even looked at what I had put up or we'd have had a talk. She did however stumble upon a decoy letter I'd left in my sock drawer one day. It was a prank letter. I started it out as if it were meant for a friend and just as it was getting juicy you had to turn the note over 1/2 way into the 2nd line my sentence changed to "Hey Chris! I hope you enjoyed this story. I ran out of time to finish!" I came home to my door off the hinges and I was grounded for a week. Well worth the price is how I viewed my punishment. I was being punished for creative writing in all honesty. She was mad about my pure evilness. As far as I was concerned, I had proven that she was indeed snooping in my room! She claimed she thought I'd somehow taken some of my sister's socks as the reason for finding the note. That in itself was hilarious to me as I had been doing my own laundry for the last couple of years! She and I both knew Cady's socks were not in my room.

I informed my brother that I was skipping school that next morning. I felt bad about leaving him without telling him what I was really doing but I couldn't risk him knowing my plan. I knew if he knew they'd know he was holding back information. I reasoned if he knew nothing he'd have nothing to hide. I heard later that he went through a lot of questioning as they were sure he knew something even though he did not.

When I arrived in French Lick I found Jeff's sister Kim but Jeff was not around at the time. He had actually gone back to Westfield for some reason. He showed up on my parent's doorstep looking for me and was informed I had run away. He was honestly surprised at the turn of events as we'd been out of contact since late October. The last he knew the plan was still the plan.

He showed back up in French Lick after I'd been there for 4 days already. The heat was amping in the search for Donna and I  . . . to this day I'm not sure why she came with me but she did. Jeff decided it would be best for us to hide out at his parents farm house for the time being. He was being so sweet and protective over me. He cooked us dinner on the burning stove and I caved in on sleeping with him that night. The next night, lights panned in the drive and Jeff ushered Donna and I up into the attic. We hid there while the local Sheriff asked some questions and looked around a little. We were not discovered. They had informed Jeff that Donna's boyfriend had been arrested for withholding information and if they saw us we needed to know this. The only way he was going to be released was if we both returned.

After a VERY long discussion it was decided that we would go back. Jeff did not want to be caught with us so in a gist we had him drop us off and Donna called her dad and he came and agreed to take me to my mother's house. I don't know why I thought my mother would protect me. I wasn't in her house for 15 minutes when she informed me my father was on his way to come get me. I jumped up grabbed my back pack and ran in my old room. I got in the closet and hid all my writings in the attic. After they were safely stashed I came back out, sat down, and waited for my fate.

My father drove me straight to the police station in Westfield and demanded that "Justice be Served". Running away is against the law. He left me there. The detective / policeman ( back then Westfield had like two police cars ) was curious as to how I had escaped. He said, "We had dead end tips from everywhere but seriously . . . you vanished into thin air. How did you pull it off?" I was not talking. I knew if they had an inkling of anyone who may have helped us they would be pressing charges on them. I was not going to be a part of punishing those who had only tried to help me with my scheme. Realizing he was not going to get anywhere he drove me over to Hamilton County Jail. Even though I was a juvenile they had no room so I was being taken to the main jail and would be safely locked in solitary confinement. I will say this, being booked was an awful experience. I was strip searched, de-liced and completely humiliated. As I've been told by various people in law enforcement all of this was necessary. In response to that claim, I state the following: "I don't have to live with how many of these "officers of the law" uphold the laws when it comes to themselves . . . that is their cross to carry. I only know this, they instilled in me a fear of them that runs all the way to my core." Many of the arresting officers inside the jail itself seemed to relish in their "duties".

On my way to being escorted to court, I was informed by the officer taking me that I was only supposed to serve one day in Hamilton County but since my friend's parents had refused to turn her over, I'd served a day for her as well as a day for myself. I'm not sure what he had to gain from that comment. Regardless, the elevator opened and there was my father on a bench and on the other side of the room was Donna with her parents. I was brought over to my father and I sat down on the bench beside him. He said, "Part of me is proud that you have a spine and seem to show no fear here . . . the other part of me wishes you were more like her." He motioned over to Donna who was currently puking due to the stress of going to court.

When we were called into the room, I had asked to be released into my mother's care and was denied. I was being released to my father and step mother. It was now December 20th. By Christmas I knew I was pregnant. I could not believe it. Here I'd tried to push that destiny for two straight months and nothing. Yet, when I ran away, I ended up conceiving. I decided life was ironic. I hadn't said anything about being pregnant yet. Chris informed me I was being taken to her doctor to be put on birth control. Still I said nothing. When she took me there I was taken back and her doctor began telling me about birth control options. I looked up at him and said, "Shouldn't you perform a pregnancy test before you prescribe me birth control?" He stared at me and asked if I thought I needed one. I shook my head yes. Sure enough the test was positive and I was taken into another room. He began informing me that it would be in this baby's best interest not to be born. I was shocked. I hit him with two barrels of "How is this upholding the view of 'Saving Lives' and your Hippocratic oath?" We argued for a moment about the beginning of "life" and he finally asked me, "Do you want me to give her the news or will you do it?" I informed him with an hour ride ahead of me I'd prefer to spill the beans myself. He told me to get dressed and he'd meet me out in the hall. When I left the room he was standing with Chris. So much for doctor patient confidentiality. The beans had been spilled.

A family meeting was called and my fate had been sealed. I would marry Jeff. I felt like I'd been thrown into the dark ages. While defiant as hell when it came to Chris and her demands. . .  such as when she informed me I was going to have to burn Jeff's letter jacket. I told her something like, "If you insist on me having no respect for other's things you may get more than your bargain for. I'll burn down your house before I'll burn his jacket." Yes. Defiant is a good way to state how I was reacting at this stage of my life. When I was told I had to get married, I flipped out. I begged to be thrown out on my own and disowned. Chris informed me it was marriage or abortion and seeing how I wasn't 17 yet, they'd march me down the aisle or I could be tied down to a bed and have my baby ripped out of me. Dead panned I looked at her and said, "You kill my baby, I kill yours." Horrible. I know. I wince at it myself. Like I said, DEFIANT to the end.

The day following my threat, I was driven to the court house and my father signed the license for me to be married. I was only allowed two 15 minute calls each day and during one of these calls I begged Jeff to find a fake preacher. I told him, "My parents aren't going to check the credentials. I will live with you but please I don't want to marry you."

I don't know why Jeff thought it would be in his best interest to force me to say vows I didn't long to say but he did. Knowing in my heart that once married, divorce was frowned down upon, I decided that this must be the beginning of my new life and I cried my way down the aisle and faced my fate like the trooper I had become!

This has been a long chapter I know. As you have read, I was not the smartest when it came to dealing with how my parents felt about me and how I was living my life. Unwise decision after unwise decision without input from God had taken me from the frying pan to the skillet so to say. In the years to come you will witness again and again how far one can go on the road to hell. . . at times in my life you'd almost believe I was on a race to see who could get there first!

Today I pray that before you react to some event in your life, you take the time to pray on it. Sit still for a moment or two. Blessings to all who try,

Wendy, Mom of Many